Tips To Build High Self-Esteem

By Zoltan Roth

When you mention high self-esteem many of us think of some "over-confident", egoistic person who has lost the sense of reality and trying to appear more than who he really is. In my opinion there is no such a thing that being too confident, having too high "amount" of self-esteem. But pretending to be self confident and showing the signs of it on the surface and living with somebody else inside that does exist.

The outside recognition could make you believe in something what you are actually not. Great examples are gang members, belonging to a certain group just because my friends go there, church, party goers etc. You can have positive feedback from them, you can pretend to feel happy among them, but if those feelings and experiences do not match with your beliefs you would not have healthy high self-esteem.

You always have to look for the company of others who can support you with their constructive criticism. Your friends' honest opinion - even if it means that you have to change certain habits or your attitude - is more important than bold agreement.

Building high self-esteem is a learned process. Everybody, I mean everybody can do that. You just have to decide to do that.

Here are some tips to help you out;

1. FOCUS: Every single cell of your body and your mental capacity has to concentrate on 1 single thing whatever you do. Focus itself can create success. Concentration is an indispensable part of high self-esteem. It will teach you how to ignore obstructions and guide your thoughts toward the chosen subject.

2. PERSISTENCE: This is the key to live a happy, blissful life you all deserve. Many people can start something, but really few would finish it. You can find those who complete the job among the most successful and/or the wealthiest people in the world.
The reason I use and/or, because to be successful you do not necessarily have to be rich in financial terms.

Mahatma Gandhi - the Great Soul of India - started fasting and the British Empire left India. He had probably no high value assets or bank accounts. He had an enormous mental and spiritual power to show people around the world, that you can achieve what you want without aggression if you are determined enough. His persistence was peaceful and "soft". That is how he became a legend.

3. TRIAL & ERROR: We all try and make mistakes. This is inevitable for our personal growth. The more you fail the more you learn.

Think of Thomas Edison who was asked after trying to create a light bulb 10000 times unsuccessfully :
"- Mr. Edison, how did it feel to fail 10000 times?"

"- I did not fail. I found 10000 ways that won't work. - he replied."

That's the spirit. You do not fail, you just learn how not to do it.

You have to start the healing process for developing high self-esteem as soon as possible. Educate yourself, read, listen and talk to people, but please remember that at the final moment you have to make the decision. You are your own "healer". You are the one who will choose pleasure instead of pain. Self-discovery, self-creation is a wonderful journey, so

ENJOY THE JOURNEY MY FRIEND

Zoltan Roth is a native Hungarian teacher who resides in the United States. His passion is to help people around the globe to discover their enormous mental potential to create a happy, peaceful life we all deserve. For more information please visit his website at http://www.selfesteem2go.com

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Higher Self Esteem And The Ability To Will!

By Nicholas Fin

What determines your daily results? The ultimate power in being able to exercise your will.

Now, some people will refer to will as 'will power' but the word "power" attached to the end of the word will only confuses us when it comes to really understanding what our will truly is.

Most of us think of power as strength, position of authority or control

The word power added to the end of our own will, speaks in terms of effort or an ability that is used, possessed or has been gained.

But this doesn't help us to understand anything!

We understand that somebody can have the ability to do a cartwheel, or a speaker having the ability to produce sounds, or the human eye possessing the ability to see. But to speak of the ability to will, leaves us completely confused to understand how naturally EFFORTLESS our will really is.

Will: To make a reasoned choice, decision and action

In other words, force and effort is not required when using will. As will is being able to choose, decide and act. We have the will to do so, as we have the freedom of choice. However, this does not mean we can do whatever we want. You cannot make someone do something against their own will

A person 'could' make someone take action by making them feel scared or excited enough. But that someone chooses and acts based on their own decisions.

A person that is scared chooses to succumb to fear by their own decisions. Someone that is excited enough decides to act according to their own reasons.

You cannot make someone do something against their own reasons and decisions, because they reason and decide according to what they choose is best for them.

The notion of somebody making someone do something against their will - is ridiculous. When you tell someone to jump they don't automatically do it every time unless they have a reason or have chosen to do so.

We all possess the ability to will and this must not be mistaken with "will power", which means to apply effort to make a simple decision.It doesn't take any effort to use your will. It's just a case of deciding to move your muscles and directing your focus in the directions you want.

Everybody has will - and for the person that has the typical "will power" label, is just someone that has become used to making decisions, and then acting upon them; as a result, they have unleashed the natural power we all possess within us. The so called 'strongest will powered person in the world' has no power of will over you, as we all have the same ability to choose, decide, think and move alike. THE POINT HERE IS THAT WE ARE ALL USING THE SAME ABILITY!

Will is just a case of: will you? Or wont you?

If you will do something; then you will use your will to take action.

Trying to use power or force against your own ability to decide and act is pointless, because you'll only be resisting against your natural ability of body and mind. When you can't be bothered to do something, you are really implying that you can't be bothered to move your own body. If you end up fighting against yourself to take action, relax and start again - to gain the habit of being able to use your will naturally and effortlessly.

Above all, the choices and decisions you make in the present regarding your unbeneficial thoughts and behaviors that you are aware of, are completely your choice if you continue to persist in them. In other words, if you become aware of your negative thoughts or behaviors and continue to do them, that's your own choice.

Are you going to choose a direction that serves you or not?

If you do not make empowering, beneficial decisions in how you want to live your life; then you have already made a decision haven't you?

You have made the decision to be directed and controlled by your environment instead of creating the future you deserve.

Make decisions that benefit your life's higher self esteem.

Determination is directed focus and action, and action is what impacts your daily life.

Act upon your beneficial feelings and decisions. And use effortless will in life to reach the given end of your desired goals.

In a nutshell

1. Will "power" is described as effort and this is WRONG!

2. To will - is to make choices, decide and act

3. Get used to using your will until it naturally becomes effortless

4. Will you - or wont you?
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4 Personal Development Steps To Higher Self-Esteem

By Michael McGrath

There are thousands, if not millions, of people who are trying to create a better life for themselves and their families. They put their best foot forward and give it everything they've got yet just seem to fail continually.

Why is this so?

The truth of failure, when you try your hardest and are prepared, is low self esteem. You cannot achieve anything of value for yourself if you do not appreciate, respect and love yourself. If you have a self-image that does not support you then no-one else will support and neither will life!

I'm sure you know of someone who sells themselves short in a relationship. There are many people who put up with unloving relationships and relationships that neither support nor encourage them. Most people keep their dreams hidden from the world and even those closest to them. They will not set goals to achieve them due to fear and apathy. What these people lack is a basic belief in themselves and their abilities.

Is there something you would like to achieve in your life or improve but you lack the belief that it is possible for you? Do you see other people succeed and believe that others can do but you can't?

We all suffer from some form of self-doubt. This is a necessary part of the human condition. Self-doubt can keep us safe. It is designed to keep us safe. You have a great deal of doubt that you could walk on water and therefore do not drown. You doubt that you are capable of walking on fire and therefore do not get burned. However, many of our doubts are unfounded and have their roots in the soil of low self-esteem!

If one human has achieved something great then other human beings can achieve it also. If you have dreams and desires rejoice. Ask yourself if you believe God would have given you such dreams and desires if you were incapable of achieving them? Do you think the Creator would be so cruel? You must realise that you would not have these dreams if you were not capable of achieving them!

However, you must learn the skills you need to learn to achieve your goals and make your action worthwhile. But, before you acquire the necessary knowledge and skill to complete the task of achieving your goals it is of major importance that you first believe that you are capable of achieving them.

To build faith and the belief that your goal will be accomplished you must first build faith and belief in yourself. You must build your confidence in your abilities and strengthen your self esteem. This will radically alter your self-image and you will start to view yourself as a winner and someone who can achieve his goals.

Here are four easy to follow steps to building your self esteem and changing your self-image.

1. The first step to high self esteem is to stop berating yourself. We all criticise ourselves. Some do it constantly. This is one of the most damaging things you can do with your thought processes. Be compassionate with yourself when you make mistakes, we all make them. Congratulate yourself that regardless of how many mistakes you have made in the past or how many hurtful experiences you encountered you were able to deal with them and are still here today and getting on with your life.

When you find yourself berating yourself then stop and reverse it. Look for the things that you did right in the situation. If you hadn't have dealt with the situation in the way you did might it have turned out worse?

2. Start to give yourself forgiveness for your previous short-comings. Forgive yourself for any past mistakes you may have made. Write them down if you want and read over them. Take the paper and tear it into tiny pieces, Then throw it away or go outside and let the wind take it for you. This is symbolic of you releasing the past and moving on.

3. Give yourself some approval. Look for the things you have done correctly. Review all the things in life that you have achieved both recently and in the long past. Allow yourself to accept that you have done things right. Give yourself compliments when you achieve even the smallest of objectives. When you complete a goal or obtain an objective reward yourself.

4. Learn to love yourself. Each day for 5 or 10 minutes stand in front of a mirror. Look into your own eyes and say out loud "I love and accept you just as you are." In the beginning this simple exercise can be extremely hard to do. Many people have become so accustomed to beating themselves up that they have forgotten how to nurture themselves. When you do this exercise you will find thoughts and feelings arising that contradict what you are saying. This is the perfect opportunity to release these past negative, false beliefs.

When such thoughts arise do not try to suppress them. Instead allow them to surface and allow yourself to fully feel the emotions that are attached to them. This is vitally important. Suppressing an emotion will keep it active and the thoughts that are linked to it. By allowing the feeling to be fully expressed in your body it will naturally dissipate. If you find some stubborn feelings and thoughts persisting then stop for a moment and give them some real thought. Is that really true about you? Is it possible that the belief you now hold could be incorrect?

When you follow these simple exercises you will build your self esteem to heights unimagined. When you increase your love and approval for yourself your life just starts working. You will find improvements begin almost immediately with little or no effort from you. A by-product of this increased self esteem will be better relationships. Your closest interpersonal relationships will benefit greatly from the work you are doing and it will all happen naturally and effortlessly. It is by loving yourself that you truly learn to love other people. When you have respect for yourself other people are tuned into this and it sends them a clear unconscious message about how you want to be treated. Treat yourself with respect,, love, compassion and kindness and others will treat you that way also.

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High Stress Means Low Self Esteem

By Nick Arrizza, M.D.

Do you have the desire for a stress free life? Most people do. After all isn't this why most people are working so hard, to achieve just that? Sounds like a paradox doesn't it, "I'm working hard to achieve a stress free life"?

Ironically, by the time you think you've gotten there, the "stress" you've endured as a result of all that work has likely taken such a toll on your health that you are not far from the end of your life. So is a stress free life actually a myth, is it even possible? In order to answer this we need to look closely at what we mean by the word "stress".

I will propose a very simple definition that you are welcome to try on for size. By "stress" I mean the emotional, mental, phyiscal and spiritual pain one feels when they are not where they desire to be in any given moment. Now by "where" I do not mean simply a physical location but rather a state. This can be a mental, emotional, physical and/or spiritual state.

Let's say, as an example that the state consists of the following thoughts and emotions:"I really don't like my job but if I leave it to do what I really have a passion for I won't survive". The "where" the person would rather be is doing something that they really have a passion for. Instead the fear of pursuing that seems to block or prevent them from realizing their passion.

Now clearly the person is not "physically" "where" they want to be. If you look a bit more closely however you might also notice that the thoughts and feelings that block that person from being physically where they want to be is also "not where they want to be".

In other words such thoughts/feelings and as "I can't leave this job" or "I'm afraid I will fail" are clearly not pleasant, comforting,freeing or desirable to that person either. It is in fact these "limiting" thoughts/emotions that keep that person in a state of stress and from realizing their passion. With that passion comes a sense of joy, aliveness, invigoration, energy, motivation,creativity, hightened performance, health etc. i.e. a "stress free" life.

Many of you however may believe that such limiting thoughts and emotions are beneficial to you i.e. you probably think that they help keep your life stable, and therefore help you feel safe and secure, and therefore help you experience a stress free life. Don't you?

If this is what you believe then just say it again to yourself and notice the stress level you feel in your body when you say it: "I can't leave my job to pursue my passion because I'm afraid I will fail". Now, did you feel your stress level go up or down. Well if you really don't like your curent job, I think the thought of having to endure it any longer is most likely driving your stress level up, not down.

So, if you follow me so far, living a stress free life is about noticing and releasing anything that keeps you from what you really have a passion for. Most importantly, because these are really the major culprit, it means releasing limiting thoughts and emotions that block you from your passion. It's that simple.

Just as an aside to be doing so also means that you are holding what you want for yourself in the highest esteem. That is you are holding your "SELF" in the highest esteem. What do you think happens to your "self esteem" when you hold you self in the highest esteem? Well naturally it goes up! Try this for your self if you wish.

Nick Arrizza M.D. is an Energy Psychiatrist, Healer, Life and Executive Coach, Speaker, Author of "Esteem for the Self: A Manual For Personal Transformation" (available in e-book format at: http://www.telecoaching4u.com/ebook.htm) and developer of the powerful Mind Resonance Process(TM). He holds international telecoaching sessions and teleconferences on healing mind, body and spirit.

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Why High Self Esteem and Self Improvement are Inseparable

By Garry Zancanaro

Self Esteem is how we feel about ourselves, how much we like and respect ourselves.

It has been said that if we don’t like ourselves it is impossible to really like, much less to love, anyone else. Liking and respecting ourselves is very different from vanity or narcissism, which at their most extreme, can become total self-absorption, selfishness and the inability to consider anyone else’s viewpoint or feelings. To have healthy self esteem, on the other hand, is to be comfortable and confident within ourselves, with who we are as people.

Most people have their self doubts, and may be uncomfortable with some of their personality traits. The good news is that we can change almost any part of our personality if it is important to us and we are prepared to put in the necessary effort. This is actually what self improvement is all about, making positive change to our lives. Making changes requires commitment and can be difficult, but there are many valuable resources available that can provide great advice and guidance.

Self esteem is about how we feel on the inside, and how we feel inside will affect how we feel and act on the outside. Our self esteem determines our personality and character, and how we react to the experiences and challenges we face in our lives. It also affects our relationships and how we interact with everyone we come in contact with. And it certainly affects how successful and happy we are throughout our lives.

Having healthy self esteem is really about feeling comfortable and confident with ourselves as we are, and appreciating ourselves as human beings. Nobody is perfect, and self improvement is an ongoing journey. The very fact that we are making the effort to improve our lives will help us to feel better about ourselves and boost our self esteem and confidence.

Self Improvement Quote of the Day:

‘If you put a small value on yourself, rest assured that the world will not raise your price.’ – Source unknown

About The Author: Garry Zancanaro is the creator of http://www.SuperSuccessLibrary.com a collection of outstanding and life changing Success and Personal Development Resources, and the founder of http://www.SelfImprovementDirectory.com where you can claim a FREE copy of THINK AND GROW RICH.

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