Showing posts with label Building Self Esteem. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Building Self Esteem. Show all posts

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Building Employee Self Esteem for Bottom Line Results

By Bob Urichuck

Self esteem is a sense of worth, not only in inner confidence and self-respect, but also outwardly in the actions one takes towards contributing to the Bottom Line.

Employee recognition is ranked the number one motivating factor when it comes to employee motivation in the workplace. If you want to maintain motivated employees, and encourage others to do better, recognizing them will help build their self esteem, while maintaining a loyal and motivated employee.

You may find it hard to believe, but recognition is the most powerful employee motivator of all because it builds one's self-esteem. Research has shown that there is a stronger need in society today for recognition (building of one's self-esteem) than there is for sex and money. Now, that says something about building self esteem and employee motivation.

Why is building self-esteem through recognition so important?

When someone gives you a compliment or recognizes you for doing something, how do you feel? Imagine, for a moment, being complimented by all your family, friends, staff and customers all day, every day. What would it do to your self-esteem, your self confidence and your self respect, and ultimately your self-worth - the bottom line?

Building self-esteem through recognition is positive reinforcement. Positive reinforcement of actions gets those actions repeated. Recognition and praise reinforces our beliefs about ourselves and helps make us think we are better than we thought we were. That is how to build employee self-esteem.

Employee motivation is positive reinforcement. Positive reinforcements is what builds our self-esteem. Our self-esteem is the way we see and feel about ourselves either internally, through our own beliefs, or externally through what we accept as the beliefs of others.

If we feel good about ourselves and we believe others feel good about us, we perform better than we would when we see the opposite side of the coin. Employee self esteem starts from external recognition and when accepted as being sincere it builds self esteem from within, which then translates into external actions leading to bottom line results.

People perform in a manner that is consistent with how they see themselves conceptually. So, the key is to help people build their self-esteem. That is the foundation of employee retention motivation and loyalty.

Unlike money which is an external motivator and never lasting, ones self- esteem is internal, and internal motivation is everlasting. In order to build a healthy self-esteem one needs recognition and praise, both from one's self and from others.

You can help build someone's self-esteem and self-motivation through recognition, but also through advancement and responsibility where that person can obtain a sense of achievement and personal growth.

The problem is that in today's society we are deprived of positive feedback. Compliments, recognition and praise are not part of our day-to-day culture. For some reason, many people find it difficult to give compliments, recognition and praise. This does nothing for one's self esteem.

My assumption is that it is hard to give something you don't have to give. How can you give someone else a compliment if you can't compliment yourself first? This goes back to our own self esteem. We must first feel good about ourselves, and tell ourselves that, before we can feel good about somebody else, and tell them that. It's a vicious circle, but it all starts within each of us. How do you feel about your own self worth - your self-esteem?

Another problem is, we live in a society that has influenced us more to look for the things people do wrong, instead of the things they do right. How do you think it impacts someone's self esteem if they are always recognized for the things they do wrong? Can you see them looking for the good in others and praising them accordingly? More likely they will find something to criticize in others.

We, as society, are to blame for this sort of behavior. It is up to each of us to change our self esteem from the inside - out.

These same influences have had an impact in our self-talk too. We tend to criticize ourselves for the things we do wrong. But how often do we praise ourselves for the things we do right?

Let's tap ourselves on the back for the good that we do. The more we do it to ourselves, the more our self esteem grows and the more our self esteem grows, the more confident we feel, which in turn helps us to give more confidence and praise to others. Building our own self esteem allows us to then give growth to the self esteem of others.

You are the leader and you must set the example by demonstrating the appropriate behavior. The appropriate behavior that we are talking about here is recognition and praise to yourself first and then to your employees. The bottom line is, for you as a leader, to build employee self esteem

Bob Urichuck is an International Speaker, Trainer and Best-Selling Author. Learn personally from Bob in the areas of Sales, Motivation, Leadership and Team Skills. Bob presents a series of great ideas and strategies with combination of facts, humor, and practical concept in a high-energy and self-discovery process that you can apply right away to achieve results. Subscribe to Bob's Free Newsletter, worth $297, visit http://www.BobU.com Now!

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Thursday, July 31, 2008

Dare to Say No and Not Feel Guilty

By Luz Aguirrebena

Are you one of those people who have trouble saying no and when you actually dare to pronounce the word, feel guilty?

Do you feel resentful to yourself and others because not being able to say no stresses you out due to the fact that you are doing things you don't want to do?

Are you afraid that if you say no people will not love you any more?

Well, you are not alone. Many people have this problem. and it is interfering in their life in a negative manner. They don't have enough time for themselves. How are they going to focus in anything and succeed? The truth of the matter is that assertiveness has a lot to do with the ability to say no. Success also. Mark my words.

So, why is it that you can't say no?

The main reason is because you have data in your hard drive that says something like this: If I say no, people will not love me any more. My time is not so important as other people's time. I have to be available all the time. The guilt of saying no consumes me.

I have news for you. The same way your computer has useless data to be deleted, you can delete that message in you head. You only have to decide you don't want to go through the pain and consequences of saying yes all the time any more. It's a choice.

The idea is to replace the data with new data. One that says something like this: It's OK to say no. My time is as valuable as other people' time. I don't have to be available all the time. I deserve to be available to myself, and the things I really want to do. When I say no people love me and respect me. Because I am respecting myself. I don't have to feel guilty for choosing myself. I deserve it.

Actually, the problem with not being able to say no, is that you attract demanding people who want more, and are never satisfied. It never is going to be enough. It's a neverending story. You are not doing any favor to them nor to you. You are enabling them to perpetrate the pattern of depending on you, blocking their own resources.

Now, when you give yourself permission to change the pattern of behavior, you have to go one step at the time.

The first time you cross the barrier of fear of saying no, you will be scared to death, but you will stand still with your brand new conviction that you are as important as other people. Once you are on the other side of that barrier you will feel good because you chose yourself this time. If the other person tries to run a guilt trip on you, you have to stand firm, even though it is difficult. Then you'll feel even better. They might be upset in the beginning. You are changing on them, how dare you, they didn't expect it. You can't blame them. They will resist for a while, but if you remain firm in your action, in the long run they will have a sense of relief. And guess what, they will respect you.

If it doesn't work that way and you lose the relationship, you are losing them, not yourself. There is a big difference. You don't need that kind of relationship. You will start attracting people who love you for who you are, not for the things you do for them.

Keep doing it, the barrier of fear gets smaller every time. After a while, guess what, it will feel pretty good inside.

Luz

http://soulhangout.net is a soul activists resource. A personal development blog, using conversation and storytelling to help you align your thoughts. Come visit and bring your soul. We'll hang out. There is also a Soul Hang Out in Spanish http://soulhangout.net/spanish if you are interested.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Luz_Aguirrebena

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Building Your Self Esteem and Confidence is Key to Self Improvement and Development

By Leon Lioe

In self improvement, we talk a lot about self esteem, the ability to stay calm, composed and confident when facing tough challenges. Basically, self esteem is the pillars that support your self improvement and development. So, if you view self improvement as a table, self esteem is the table's legs. They got to be strong to support the table.

If we have a low self esteem, our confidence will tumble and we won't be able to face daily challenges. Our self esteem is like a dash board, and hence a dart pin can land on it any time without a warning. If we've low self esteem, a small dart pin can just destroy our entire self confidence. That's why building a strong self esteem is critical to your self development.

Following are some tips you may find useful in helping you to harness your self esteem.

1. Learn to interact with positive people. Do not shy away from people, learn how to socialize and interact with people. Overcome your shyness, we only live once in this world, so there is nothing to be ashamed of. The more you socialize and interact with people around you, the more comfortable you will become, and your self esteem will build up slowly.

2. Avoid negative work environment. Stay away from a work environment that promotes unhealthy competition, a dog-eats-dog and back-stabbing work culture where everybody is fighting just to get ahead. This is where non-appreciative people usually thrive. Your self esteem will be destroyed when no one appreciate your efforts and contributions. If you feel that the company you're working right now has such environment, look for a new job and get out from there as soon as you can.

3. Acknowledge your past mistakes and learn from the experiences. It's okay to cry when we experience pain. But don't let pain transform itself into FEAR. There is a time to cry from your misfortune and there is a time to recover. Do not dwell on your problems, learn from it, shake it off and move on. If you dwell on a problem for too long, it might grab you by the tail, swing you around and totally destroy your self esteem. Don't let that happens to you. Treat each failure and mistake as a lesson.

4. Avoid negative view and be optimistic. Always try to see the positive part of any problem first. Wish for the best things in life and believe that every challenge or problem you experience is for the benefit of you to improve. Don't wrap yourself up with all the negativities of the world. In building self esteem, we must learn how to make the best out of worst situations.

5. Think positively. Always think about the good qualities and abilities in you. Focus on your strengths instead of weaknesses. Everything starts from your mind, if you think you can then you can and vice versa. Make positive thinking becomes your second habit and your self esteem will build up in no time.

6. Do not worry about the future or things that haven't occurred. Just strive to do your best and do the right things today and tomorrow will take care of itself.

7. If you have a problem, do not avoid or pretend that it doesn't exist. Face your problem and deal with it. Get help from family members or closed friends if necessary. Share with them openly about the problem you're facing and ask for help. You will be amazed that people are generally willing to help, sometimes all you need to do is just ASK. Families and friends can help boost your self esteem and motivate you to face your problem.

When we develop self esteem, we take control of our life mission, values and discipline. Self esteem brings about self improvement and self development, positive attitude, and self determination.

More interesting articles on building self esteem confidence are available at our self improvement tips blog.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Leon_Lioe

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Self Esteem, Community Service and Empowerment - Part 2

By H. Veronika Gaia

In Part 1 of this article, I presented the rationale and keys for success to create a school community service program. As stated, organizing community service projects allows students to participate in the group process of cooperative learning, conflict resolution, critical thinking and problem solving. Students enhance self esteem through experience. Consequently, self esteem becomes earned esteem. Part 2 is a description of the two components of a successful community service program.

Two components of a successful community service program

• One component of the program could be integrated into the school day. Examples of successful community service projects integrated into the school day are trips to a soup kitchen, working with a kindertime program for pre-school children and collections for needy causes. These could be scheduled monthly by teams or groups of classrooms.

• There could also be an after-school component of the program that would involve a weekly commitment by students for a specified number of months.

Members who join the after-school program would divide into several groups. The individual groups would have brainstorming sessions concerning community service project selections that would allow students to practice interpersonal skills and build relationships.

1. Service project ideas are limitless and depend on the creativity and interests of the groups.
2. Each group designs its own year-long program and the organization experience provides a learning that involves decision-making skills, communication skills and the process of working within a system.
3. Each group creates its own name and selects four to six community service projects to be completed during the school year after school.
4. Chosen group names would reflect the community service mission for individual groups and could be an acronym. Following are examples of actual names used by middle school students:
• P.R.O. (People Reaching Out)
• S.U.N.S.H.I.N.E. (Students Unite Nations)
• C.A.R.S (Caring and Respectful Students)
• S.M.I.L.E. (Students Making Individuals Laugh Everyday)
• H.O.P.S.C.O.T.C.H. (Helping Other People Simply Cause Our Touch Can Heal)
Develop partnerships with the community. In my personal situation, we developed an on-going working relationship with a nursing home, a center for mentally-challenged adults, a day care center, a pre-school program, a community pediatrics health center and a soup kitchen.

The lesson of responsible active citizenship is the intention of all the community service project experiences and ideas create change becomes the principle of active citizenship. Let your students be your heroes. Your young student activists can make a difference in our world. I share this as a proud teacher who has observed dedicated young people who are remarkable as role models for their peers, their teachers, their families and their community.


About the author: H. Veronika Gaia is a teacher, writer and nature photographer. She believes that every person can make a difference in our world. PeacemakersArt.com provides opportunities for you to make a contribution by purchasing with a purpose. Veronika sells inspirational nature photography art as greeting cards, motivational posters and fine art prints with peaceful intentions for self awareness, human potential and community service. Please visit her website at http://www.PeacemakersArt.com/ .

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Monday, July 14, 2008

How's Your Self-Esteem, Baby Boomer?

By Amy Sherman

What do you know about your self-esteem? In general, self-esteem is the mental image you hold about who you are. As you age, your self-esteem will naturally improve, since you don't have to deal with the silly adolescent pressures of your youth. In fact, most people think of adults as being confident, self-assured and capable. But as you know, you have moments of insecurity and doubt that leave you feeling inept and uncertain. One thing is definite. Changes in health, life-style, family roles, activities and finances may adversely affect your self-concept and self-esteem.

Here are some tips to help boost your self-image and put you back on the road to self-confidence and self-belief.

1. Remain in control of your health. Eat a nutritious diet designed to maintain your good health. For instance, if you have high blood pressure, be sure to adhere to a low-sodium dietary protocol because it will assure your feeling good and keeping your heart healthy.

2. Manage your time effectively. Stay mentally active in life-long learning classes. Include daily physical exercise programs, volunteer, have family outings, all with the intent of making your day full and pleasing.

3. Maintain a strong social life, doing things with others who share your same interests. Being involved in church or civic groups, political organizations, adventure and sporting events, etc keep you involved and engaged in activities with other interesting people.

4. Remind yourself of who you are and what you have accomplished over your lifetime. Reassess your contributions to others and to the broader community and continue to give what you can, when you can.

5. With your children older or out of the house, you may feel less important or valued. Examine new options for making your life exciting and even better. There may be new methods you can learn for improving old skills. For instance, many midlife adults go back to hobbies they put aside years ago, only to learn a better or more efficient technique.

A good self-esteem will keep you happier, healthier and feeling younger. What do you know about your self-esteem? It never has to go down or be diminished because of the natural changes that occur in your life. You can maintain a strong self-image when you maintain your personal sense of control and take charge of your life's plan.

Amy Sherman, LMHC, is a licensed mental health counselor in private practice. Amy is the author of the ebook, "Distress-Free Aging: A Boomer's Guide to Creating a Fulfilled and Purposeful Life." She specializes in issues specific to the 40+ generation and is available for telephone coaching, face-to-face therapy, teleseminars, radio and TV interviews. For more information, go to http://www.bummedoutboomer.com sign up for her free newsletter and receive a Special Report on Overcoming Adversity. She can be reached by email at amy@bummedoutboomer.com or by phone at 561) 281-2975.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Amy_Sherman

Saturday, June 28, 2008

Simple, Quick Self Esteem Hypnosis

By Alex Hawk

Hypnotizing yourself to raise your self esteem

Our self esteem plays a critical role in our lives. Without confidence, we can't achieve success and we'd feel alienated from society. It would be a safe assumption to say that self esteem and happiness are closely linked, so how can you survive without it?

By spending quality time to improve yourself and your self esteem, your confidence will gradually grow and eventually, you will become a better person. Although there are many ways of accomplishing this, one of the most effective way is through self esteem hypnosis.

What Is Self Esteem Hypnosis?

Think of hypnosis as something close to meditation. It's easy, simple, natural, and fun to do. Many consider it an expert tool in raising your self esteem. In fact, it's a very powerful and effective tool to use when facing those negative, "rainy" days.

One Quick Self Esteem Hypnosis Trick

Breathe deep. Relax. Slow down your mind and your body. Your mind should be giving you positive thoughts that you should focus on. After that bring up negative memories.

See yourself in the situation, but this time as the person you'd like to become. Think his thoughts. Feel her feelings. Continue to breathe deep.

What you're accomplishing is the gradual "re-association" of positive feelings with past negative events. By doing so, you're converting your mind (and thus yourself) into the person you want to be.

By deciding how you want to respond, think, and feel in different situations, you empower yourself. As you can see, this is a very powerful tool when used consistently and persistently.

Other Uses Of Self Esteem Hypnosis

Hypnosis is also great for changing numerous other issues.

In fact, you can even use hypnosis to quit smoking and drinking. With a new positive attitude, you won't be needing anymore vices to run away to.

Self esteem hypnosis is a power tool that you must take advantage of. Use it wisely to gradually improve yourself, remove those vices, and fit in with society better.

If you're looking for more quick, simple, easy, and effective positive thinking to boost self esteem, be sure to check out this FREE self esteem blog

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Alex_Hawk

Friday, June 27, 2008

Tips To Build High Self-Esteem

By Zoltan Roth

When you mention high self-esteem many of us think of some "over-confident", egoistic person who has lost the sense of reality and trying to appear more than who he really is. In my opinion there is no such a thing that being too confident, having too high "amount" of self-esteem. But pretending to be self confident and showing the signs of it on the surface and living with somebody else inside that does exist.

The outside recognition could make you believe in something what you are actually not. Great examples are gang members, belonging to a certain group just because my friends go there, church, party goers etc. You can have positive feedback from them, you can pretend to feel happy among them, but if those feelings and experiences do not match with your beliefs you would not have healthy high self-esteem.

You always have to look for the company of others who can support you with their constructive criticism. Your friends' honest opinion - even if it means that you have to change certain habits or your attitude - is more important than bold agreement.

Building high self-esteem is a learned process. Everybody, I mean everybody can do that. You just have to decide to do that.

Here are some tips to help you out;

1. FOCUS: Every single cell of your body and your mental capacity has to concentrate on 1 single thing whatever you do. Focus itself can create success. Concentration is an indispensable part of high self-esteem. It will teach you how to ignore obstructions and guide your thoughts toward the chosen subject.

2. PERSISTENCE: This is the key to live a happy, blissful life you all deserve. Many people can start something, but really few would finish it. You can find those who complete the job among the most successful and/or the wealthiest people in the world.
The reason I use and/or, because to be successful you do not necessarily have to be rich in financial terms.

Mahatma Gandhi - the Great Soul of India - started fasting and the British Empire left India. He had probably no high value assets or bank accounts. He had an enormous mental and spiritual power to show people around the world, that you can achieve what you want without aggression if you are determined enough. His persistence was peaceful and "soft". That is how he became a legend.

3. TRIAL & ERROR: We all try and make mistakes. This is inevitable for our personal growth. The more you fail the more you learn.

Think of Thomas Edison who was asked after trying to create a light bulb 10000 times unsuccessfully :
"- Mr. Edison, how did it feel to fail 10000 times?"

"- I did not fail. I found 10000 ways that won't work. - he replied."

That's the spirit. You do not fail, you just learn how not to do it.

You have to start the healing process for developing high self-esteem as soon as possible. Educate yourself, read, listen and talk to people, but please remember that at the final moment you have to make the decision. You are your own "healer". You are the one who will choose pleasure instead of pain. Self-discovery, self-creation is a wonderful journey, so

ENJOY THE JOURNEY MY FRIEND

Zoltan Roth is a native Hungarian teacher who resides in the United States. His passion is to help people around the globe to discover their enormous mental potential to create a happy, peaceful life we all deserve. For more information please visit his website at http://www.selfesteem2go.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Zoltan_Roth

Saturday, June 21, 2008

Improving Body Image and Self Esteem May Be a Key to Your Success

By Sharon Francis

Your positive self-esteem is your foundation for success and without it you can feel down, depressed, inferior and suffer a lack confidence in many situations. There are many factors, affirmations and lessons to help you on the way to improving self esteem. One major connection that will be discussed here is that of the connection between how an individual sees their body image and how it affects their self esteem.

Building Self Esteem - A Healthy Body Leads to a Healthy Mind

Floppy loose skin, fat deposits building up around your neck and under your chin, love handles, fat rolls under your bra line, thighs, hips, back becoming roly-poly, a protruding fat tummy! Your body image and self esteem definitely have a link as to how you see your self and no matter what compliments other people give, if you are unhappy about your image then you may not be willing to accept it.....a sure sign of low self esteem.

People come in all shapes and sizes and it's easy to say that you should be happy with what you are born with but there is no rule to say that you should adjust your body image to fit in with 'the norm of society'...all you need to do to improve your body image and self esteem is make adjustments to the way you think about yourself and make sure you feel healthy and if that means taking exercise then all the better for you. The main point is that you feel good about yourself without the drastic measures of surgery.

Despite having said all that, the stresses and strains of the modern world place people under increasing pressure such as earning more money, looking younger, looking thinner, being a better parent and having a successful career and so on it goes means that building self esteem is no easy task. Improving how you look can definitely have a positive effect on your self esteem which will ultimately help you in your career or what ever path you choose to take. Some people handle body image very differently than others and often you will find those suffering from physical deformities may have a far higher self esteem than others who don't.

How you choose to improve your body image is your choice. One important aspect is that you are motivated as once you start to feel the benefits then you will wonder why you never started sooner. Just the initial realisation that there is a connection between body image and self esteem is one important stepping stone to feeling better about yourself.

For more help and some methods to improve body image and self esteem and generally improving self esteem then visit http://www.lowselfesteemadvice.com.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Sharon_Francis

Friday, June 20, 2008

Love and Self-esteem

By Gloria Hamilten

Do you ever think you should visit someone, like a member of the family, and then decide against it, and then the next time you think about it, quite some time has passed?

You feel bad, so you postpone it again.

Does this sound familiar? Yes, I'm sure it does.

But really, some people do not care about what you have achieved; they just want you to show up.

We do not always need to impress others, to tell them fascinating interesting things that we have being doing.

They just want us to show up and keep company for awhile.

Each visit does not have to be long, rather have more short ones and more frequent ones and just chat; just 'be with them'.

This is what loving is all about, showing up, and this is what feeds self-esteem.

Research findings have shown that successful women in strenuous, traditionally male-dominated corporate environments are physically going bald as they are now producing more testosterone.

Many of these women wear pants suits, very tailored suits and try to fit in to the masculine physical and behavioural 'look' to achieve credibility.

They lose their femininity, forgetting the yin and yang harmony of life, and the importance of loving yourself and being true to yourself to build self-esteem.

If you really want to do something, really, really, really, and there is no apparent physical hindrance, you can: nothing and no one can stop you, not even the 'glass ceiling'.

A different issue exists, whether you want to, but if you want to, you can.

An analogy for self-esteem is like a cattle pen holding in the cattle and the gate is locked.

Open the gate and the cattle will stampede through.

Open the gate to your blockages of self-esteem, and let your self-esteem, stampede out - for all the world to enjoy.

Only you can make these changes, because your self-esteem is not dependent on anything except love.

You are a child of your Creator and are born perfect.

Conditioning has altered your belief in yourself, but you have not changed in your innate perfection.

Remember achievements and events just 'things that we experience', they are not who we are.

To get attached is pointless.

This does not mean that we cannot get excited, that is the emotion we keep, but the event that caused that emotion, that is what we need to detach from.

For example, detach from money, just acknowledge what it can do.

You find people who have this outlook on money, often attract money to them, because they have no attachment it.

For many millionaires, multi-millionaires and billionaires, it is the process of acquiring the money that is exciting and what they can give back to society as a result of it.

I've met a few people, who said that once they had made their first million, they were surprised at how uneventful it really was.

They could not believe it. For so long they had dreamt of that moment, and now that it was here, it was a non-event.

They continued working for the fun of it, and of course amassed more.

Just think of a present you once really, really wanted, and then you received it. There was no more excitement, was there?

Same thing.

And finally.

Love cannot be taught. Love is 'learned' by seeing it demonstrated.

Love needs to be demonstrated - actions speak louder than words.

Gloria M Hamilten is a recognized authority in disciplines within Personal Development and People Skills for Business Professionals, such as Time Management, Negotiation Skills, Developing High-Performance Teams, Assertion Skills, Building International Rapport, Conflict Management and Resolution, Presentation and Platform Skills.

Her studies in Neuro-Linguistic Programming and Psychology have lead to her researching brain disorders such as ADD and its relations.

She has her own training business, and conducts courses for Corporate Organizations, Sporting groups and Tertiary Educational Institutions in Australia.

Her professional experience covers over 30 years of study, research, one-on-one coaching, group coaching, presentations and workshops. Her clientele includes children as well as adults.

Gloria Hamilten has authored the eBook: "Practical Self-Hypnosis for Success" and many Reports and online articles.

Her websites provide a wealth of informative articles and resources on everything within these genres.

Visit her websites:

http://www.connect4results.com

http://neuro-linguistic-pro-site.com

This article may be freely reprinted or distributed in its entirety in any ezine, newsletter, or website. The author's name, bio and website links must remain intact and be included with every reproduction.

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Thursday, June 19, 2008

Self-Esteem - Open the Floodgates

By Gloria Hamilten

Children often use love substitutes to get attention either positive attention or negative attention.

When you were growing up and were still a child, quite unconsciously, you used the three "As" to obtain what you perceived to be love.

The three As are:

• Attention

• Approval

• Achievement

If as a child, you felt deprived of love, you would have sought it using these three strategies.

You would have sought attention, even if it was negative attention. Feeling starved for love, the feeling that someone was talking to you, even if it was repramanding fulfilled your feeling of not being loved.

With the second strategy, approval, your reasoning would have been: 'If I am good I will get approval and that means they love me.'

So, you find the child who would appear to conform so as to be praised by teachers, even if it mean being ostracised by peers, as a goody-goody.

Either way, the child would have felt a sense of importance.

And the third, achievement, is a type of alternative or substitute for approval and/or attention.

Achievement could have come in getting awards and walking up on stage at school assemblies, final year award presentations, in charge of extra-curricular club groups, and so on.

So your school results were either very good and you would receive approval, of they were very bad and you would still receive attention.

However, even if you received heaps of attention and approval, these artificial means of getting 'love', still left an empty feeling.

Thus you did more of the above to get more love substitutes, but it never filled the void.

Many of these characteristics from school days disappeared once you had more control on your life and you sought different ways of being noticed as an adult.

In your everyday adult world you may not be aware of the level of your self-esteem.

It is when you need to get out of your comfort zone, when you have to try something new, something unfamiliar, when you have to do something you've unsuccessfully tried before, that the true worth of your self-esteem surfaces.

Have you ever caught yourself saying any of the following?

• I can't do that!

• I'll never be able to do that!

• I'm no good at that; never have been!

• I've never been good at that!

• Mum always said, I can't do those things

• Dad says, I'm hopeless at ball games

• I've always been too weak to do that

• I've always hated art; I can't draw

• I have to do (whatever it is) to prove it to my parents

• I have to prove myself

• I'll show them how good I am!

• I'll do it my way, too bad if I stuff it

• I usually stuff it, anyway

• And so on

If you have ever said anything, even remotely resembling the above, there are chinks in your self-esteem.

Seriously.

Here is a quote from Paul Blackburn, a highly respected life change guru of Australia, I especially like:

"You are the resource the rest of your life depends on."

Ummmm. What do you say to that?

Humbling, isn't it?

How are you looking after your resource, you?

Here is another quote:

"People are like teabags because you don't know how strong they are until you put them in hot water."

Nice, isn't?

Gloria M Hamilten is a recognized authority in disciplines within Personal Development and People Skills for Business Professionals, such as Time Management, Negotiation Skills, Developing High-Performance Teams, Assertion Skills, Building International Rapport, Conflict Management and Resolution, Presentation and Platform Skills.

Her studies in Neuro-Linguistic Programming and Psychology have lead to her researching brain disorders such as ADD and its relations.

She has her own training business, and conducts courses for Corporate Organizations, Sporting groups and Tertiary Educational Institutions in Australia.

Her professional experience covers over 30 years of study, research, one-on-one coaching, group coaching, presentations and workshops. Her clientele includes children as well as adults.

Gloria Hamilten has authored the eBook: "Practical Self-Hypnosis for Success" and many Reports and online articles.

Her websites provide a wealth of informative articles and resources on everything within these genres.

Visit her websites:

http://www.connect4results.com

http://neuro-linguistic-pro-site.com

This article may be freely reprinted or distributed in its entirety in any ezine, newsletter, or website. The author's name, bio and website links must remain intact and be included with every reproduction.

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Friday, April 25, 2008

Tips For Building Womens Self Esteem

By Penny Dablin

Women's self-esteem has always been much lower than men's self-esteem. This comes from our childhood where little boys are encouraged to take risks, be strong and be leaders. Little girls, on the other hand, are encouraged to be pretty and quiet and polite to visitors. Is it any wonder that many women suffer from feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem?

So what can be done about women's self esteem? Here are three easy actions you can take to increase your self esteem today.

1. Accept yourself as you are and release any feeling you have that you should be different.

This might sound perverse but the truth is what we resist, persists. If you wish you were different and that you had higher levels of self-esteem you will get in your own way and perpetuate the problem. Start by accepting that you are who you are. Release any need to be different.

The amazing thing is that once you stop resisting you allow room for you to change.

2. Love yourself without reservation.

Look in the mirror, look deeply into your own eyes and talk to yourself as you might talk to a beloved partner. Really make contact with the you behind your reflection and say things like: "I love you", "I appreciate you", "I approve of you", "You are wonderful", "You are strong", "You are courageous". Hold your gaze and really project your love and acceptance to your reflection. Start to believe the wonderful things you are saying to yourself.

3. Focus outside yourself.

Help someone else who is less fortunate than you. Volunteer at a local charity, hospital or children's group.

You could perhaps teach basic life skills to young adults who are on probation or in prison - often it's a lack of these basic skills that has led them to a life of crime.

Or you could help with reading and writing skills at your local school or with learning disabled adults.

There are literally hundreds of options to help someone else. Each one will turn your focus outwards away from yourself and toward someone less able than you. This will pull you out of the downward spiral of depression that tends to feed off low self esteem and help you increase your own level of self esteem.

If you take action with these three ideas you will find yourself with raised self esteem. You will start to feel better about yourself and more able to cope with life without getting depressed.
Penny Dablin is a life coach and the author of How To Feel Great, Find Love and Get Promoted: 50 Ways To Boost Your Self-Esteem

For many more tips and techniques for building women's self esteem and a free sneak preview of the book go to http://www.50waystoboostyourselfesteem.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Penny_Dablin

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Optimism in Building Self Esteem

By Lily Woods

Did it feel like you have tried being a better person but had exhausted all possible options? Here are some thoughts to make it through the week even if you're just sitting in your working desk waiting for time to pass. An idea takes time to form in your head and is always at work while you are busy sitting. If you've placed second in a writing contest, will you jump for joy and push for better results the next time or will you be discouraged and find an excuse not to join again? It's easy to determine if you are a common optimist or a pessimist.

Optimism has been linked to positive mood and good morale; to academic, athletic, military, occupational and political success; to popularity; to good health and even to long life and freedom from trauma. With some creative problem-solving techniques you may be able to look at your problem in a different light. Having a bit of positive thinking can help you realize things that are never thought possible.

Optimists tend to focus on and plan for the 'problem' at hand. You must be open-minded to the fact that there may be more than just one solution to the problem. Such people are unfazed by bad situation, they perceive it is a challenge and try harder. Thinking big is indeed the American Way and that what made our country prosperous.

People respond positively to optimists. Commit to yourself as well as those you love to create powerfully a life you can love. Their optimistic view of the world can be contagious and influence those they are with.

Optimists are healthier and live longer than pessimists. Keep humor at the forefront of thought, laughing at and with yourself when possible. Medical research has justified that simple pleasures and a positive outlook can cause a measurable increase in the body's ability to fight disease.

Choose the person you want to become today. Why not look forward to success in all your endeavors? Why not be resilient? And just when you are enjoying the whole process of unlocking your optimism power, you'll realize that you're beginning to take things light and become happy.
Having low self esteem? Read more simply yet motivating methods at http://BetterSelfEsteem.com

Article Source: http://www.ArticleBiz.com

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

Self-esteem Has a Big Impact on How We Enjoy Life

By Andrea Baljak

Your self-esteem is like a star at night that shines brightest when it is the darkest. It is your inner light that burns brightly and freely no matter what is happening around you. A Zen saying reminds us: "What was your original face before you were born?"

Self-esteem is perfectly intact when we are born, in fact, it is inherent to us; however, it often diminishes over the course of our childhood. We lose a little of it whenever we fail, make mistakes, misbehave, feel guilty, refuse to forgive, neglect ourselves, and/or do things we are ashamed of. As an adult, we sometimes feel as if our "self" is in pieces--- that we are somehow not whole and complete.

This is not true. We are whole and complete even with our missing pieces and broken parts. We just need to decide to gather up ourselves up and become whole again. I am willing to bet that when you look back over your life, the first thing that comes to mind are the regrets, the sad times in your past.

Do you see the pieces of yourself lying along the path of your life? The ones where you didn't feel good enough, or where you were criticized or blamed by someone else? But have you ever stopped to look at the memories of when you won the prize, felt really great, on top of the world----those moments that prove what a wonderfully amazing human being you are?

It is your birthright to love and honor yourself. The good news is that you can reclaim that which is yours. That is your self-esteem.

There is absolutely no reason at all why people should "suffer" from low self esteem. Your self esteem is something over which you have absolute and immediate control. Think of self esteem as a muscle; it never stays the same for any period of time.

Like any muscle it either weakens or gets stronger. Self esteem improvement is like exercising a muscle. It relies on small incremental improvement on a daily basis. You won't run out to the gym and have perfect muscles for life in an hour. Consistent self-esteem improvement is the only way to lasting success and an increase in the quality of your life everyday you live it.

Your self-esteem contributes to your vitality, energy level, persistence, and personal magnetism. Self-esteem is about what is on the inside, a belief in yourself and your abilities. Positive esteem focuses on acceptance of self and others. It remains constant despite the storm. This fosters cooperation and wholeness.

Building self-esteem will eventually lead to self improvement if we start to become responsible for who we are, what we have and what we do. It's like a flame that should gradually spread like a brush fire from inside and out. When we develop self esteem, we take control of our mission, values and discipline. Self esteem brings about self improvement, true assessment, and determination.

Be positive. Be contented and happy. Be appreciative. Never miss an opportunity to compliment.
A positive way of living will help you build self esteem, your starter guide to self improvement. It is never too late to build your self-esteem. You can start RIGHT NOW! Self-esteem has a big impact on how we enjoy life. Respect others, yourself, and life in general. Practice the techniques we have given you every single day. Watch them work wonders in your life.

Become the person you can be and treat yourself well. You deserve it!

We are growing! Visit the best place in the Universe of Internet where you'll find everything about Self-Improvement! And more... Much more... And read more about the "How to Build Your Self-Esteem" at:

http://www.fightyourfears.com/

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Wednesday, March 26, 2008

How to Build Your Self-Esteem

By Andrea Baljak

Esteem is a simple word. It is worth and value that we apply to people, places, and situations. It is the amount of respect we assess. We have esteem for our world leaders. We have esteem for places like church and synagogue. We have esteem for an exemplary performance whether it is in sports, acting, or simply doing the right thing.

But the most important place we need to apply esteem is within ourselves. We must maintain our self-esteem in order to place value on ourselves as a worthy individual in the world. Self-esteem can affect every single part of our lives. If that esteem is low, our lives will be dull and gray. Elevating esteem for ourselves could very well be the key to happiness in life.

Most people's feelings and thoughts about themselves fluctuate somewhat based on their daily experiences. The grade you get on an exam, how your friends treat you, ups and downs in a romantic relationship-all can have a temporary impact on your well being. Your own self-esteem, however, is something more fundamental than the normal "ups and downs" associated with situational changes.

For people with good basic self-esteem, normal "ups and downs" may lead to temporary fluctuations in how they feel about themselves, but only to a limited extent. In contrast, for people with poor basic self-esteem, these "ups and downs" may make all the difference in the world.

People with poor self-esteem often rely on how they are doing in the present to determine how they feel about themselves. They need positive external experiences to counteract the negative feelings and thoughts that constantly plague them. Even then, the good feeling (from a good grade, etc.) can be temporary.

Healthy self-esteem is based on our ability to assess ourselves accurately (know ourselves) and still be able to accept and to value ourselves unconditionally. This means being able to realistically acknowledge our strengths and limitations (which is part of being human) and at the same time accepting ourselves as worthy and worthwhile without conditions or reservations.

What we want to do is help you raise your self-esteem to levels that will enhance your life and the way you view life. It can make a tremendous difference in your quality of life. Learning techniques to raise self-esteem can be taught and put into practice in just a few days. However, it will take practice to keep your self-worth at the forefront.

We can show you how to improve your self-esteem in just one weekend! Three short days where you will apply what this book will show you and that will stay with you as your life becomes the bright place it should be.

We are growing! Visit the best place in the Universe of Internet where you'll find everything about Self-Improvement! And more... Much more... And read more about the "How to Build Your Self-Esteem" at:
http://www.fightyourfears.com/

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Andrea_Baljak

Help Your Teenager Increase Their Self Esteem

By Scotie Keithlow

Adolescence is probably the most befuddling time that an individual goes through. It is a time when you are no longer a child but have yet to enter complete adulthood. This age of incomplete maturity can be extremely dangerous. There is many a fall in the attempt of the young fledglings to spread their wings and fly. There is a conflict between the child and the emerging individual who has his own opinions and preferences.

Have obtained a considerable understanding of how the adult world functions, there is extreme excitement to experience this new world individually without being guarded by parents. Yearning to enter adulthood, these transforming young tykes do not understand that they have absorbed only a fraction of the mysteries that adult life has in store for them. At a time like this, the teenagers not only go through emotional turmoil and conflicts but also experience physical changes.

All this and much more than what anyone can put on paper is what these teenagers go through between the fragile years of thirteen to eighteen. The most long lasting effect that this phase can leave on the child's psychology is the lowering of self esteem, if not handled judiciously.

Parents need to realize that they have a principal role to play in seeing their young ones through these turbulent times. The process of holding your child's hand through this process starts with taking an active interest in his or her friends, hobbies and interests. Take time out to understand the strengths and weaknesses of your child. This allows you to empathize what your child may be experiencing and will provide an insight into the likely pitfalls that he or she may face while confronting new situations.

Setting a good example is very important. Children and teens learn by example and if you exude self esteem, the youngsters are also likely to have a positive attitude. It is important also to understand that your 'minors' are now becoming 'majors' and need to be given respect. Invite and appreciate their contribution to an adult family discussion and make them a part of the decision making process at home. Discuss the issues which you know may be bothering them but are uncomfortable for them to talk about. Understand that the media focus on perfection may influence your teens and try and show them the practical aspect if life.

Sense the troubles that your child may be having and initiate a discussion around it. If he or she is breaking into an obnoxious inflammation due to acne, take the first step in contacting a dermatologist. In a particularly harassing event for you try and keep your calm and avoid confrontation. Encourage discussions and compromise when you need to.

If you feel that the self esteem of your child is going through more turmoil than you can handle, arrange for self esteem building classes.

The key to seeing your child through this perplexing phase is to encourage open communication and provide voluntary information.

To find more information about teens problems and low self esteem visit http://teen-articles.com

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Friday, March 21, 2008

5 Ways to Stop Second Guessing Yourself

By Steve Errey

I remember breakfast time one morning, some 7 or 8 years ago. I was standing in front of an open cupboard in my kitchen, my eyes flicking between a box of Frosties and a box of Cornflakes, trying to decide which to have for breakfast. I stood there for 5 minutes, until - utterly frustrated - I slammed the cupboard door shut and went without breakfast altogether.

I've learned to make decisions quicker and easier now and it's something that I'll often work with clients to improve. Here are my 5 ways to make confident decisions. Oh, I decided on cranberry granola this morning, by the way.

Test them against your values.Your values are the building blocks, cornerstones and foundations for who you are, and are the things in yourself, others or out there in the world that are most important to you. Know your values and you get the chance to express them, and when you do that all it means is that you're expressing who you really are, way down inside. It feels pretty amazing.

So how do your values fit into decision making? Simple. When you're faced with a tricky decision you can line up your different choices and ask "Which one of these most honours my values?" The decision that's most in line with your values will be the best decision for you (even if it's not the simplest or most practical), because it fits with who you are and what's most important to you. Told you it was simple.

Be like Columbo.When I was growing up I used to love rainy Sunday afternoons watching Columbo, and loved the bit at the end where he'd sidle up to the Bad Guy, say "Just one more thing" and then proceed to blow apart the bad guys alibi. Genius. What Columbo had in spades, other than a penchant for cubans and raincoats, was a great trust in his intuition. In every episode, from the very moment he first meets the bad guy, he knows 'whodunnit' - and more importantly, he trusts it.

What does your intuition tell you is the 'right' decision for you. Forget about all the "What if's" and the details - what does your gut tell you? Learn to listen to your intuition, it knows what it's talking about.

It just doesn't matter.My decision between Frostie's and Cornflakes wasn't a biggie. Whichever I chose, there were never going to be any huge consequences and the ripples from that decision wouldn't have been felt much further than the end of my spoon. The point is, sometimes it just doesn't matter which way you go.

It's not just tiny, silly little breakfast-related decisions either - with bigger decisions it's easy to get wrapped up in second guessing yourself, going round in circles and over-complicating things, when - if you get right down to it - it just doesn't matter.

Going round in circles is only going to make you dizzy, so stop it. Ask yourself this question - if your future happiness wasn't dependent on your decision (and it isn't, by the way), which way would you go?

Have enough information.By all means look at the facts before you make a complex decision. By all means weigh up the pro's and con's so that you can get an understanding of the 'science' behind a decision, but be careful. There's a big difference between knowing enough to make a choice, and knowing everything to make choice.

When you feel that happening, stop yourself, get a change of environment and ask yourself "What do I really need to know to be able to make this decision?"

Doubt vs The Gremlin.Everyone has a part of themselves that doesn't like change, a part that uses every trick in the book to avoid making decisions so that you can stay exactly where you are. I call it the Gremlin, and it's a part of you that would rather avoid making decisions altogether rather than run the risk of making a bad one or screwing up.

This is a world away from having doubts. Doubts are valid concerns about a possible course of action, or reasonable concerns about what might be in store. Your doubts are there to help you prepare for change and prepare for what could happen.

Knowing the difference between your doubts and your Gremlin helps you clarify what's real and what's imagined, what's relevant and what isn't relevant.

I use these myself - different strategies for different decisions at different times - and I always find something that works.

About Steve Errey

Steve Errey is the author of the Truly Confident Living Home Study Course. He's a confidence coach with hundreds of clients under his belt from all around the world, articles in magazines on both sides of the Atlantic and regular expert slots on television and radio. Earlier, he was a Project Manager in e-Business, travelling the world helping organisations deliver on the Internet promise. He has been through redundancy (when the Internet bubble burst), depression and a debt management plan. Steve is also writing his first novel.

Visit his website and blog at http://www.theconfidenceguyonline.com.

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Sunday, March 16, 2008

Build Your Self Esteem

By Judith Gerhart

The other morning I attended a women's networking meeting. The group's focus was female entrepreneurship, and the room was filled with an eclectic mix of married, divorced, widowed and single women. Many were trying to start a business while at the same time as trying to pull their lives together. I noticed a lot of talk about self-esteem and confidence. We all took 30 seconds to stand up and sell our ideas and ourselves.

Many of the women talked about their lack self-confidence and how it made them afraid to stand up and speak for the 30 seconds. Yet I marveled at how well all these women did, keeping in mind that for many, it had been a long time since they stood in front of their peers to present themselves as brands, and not just as moms or wives.

It reminded me of how little we support and teach young women about self-esteem, which has two distinct components: The first component is self-confidence. The second part of self-esteem, which I consider more critical, is the ability to take action.

When we take action we begin to believe in ourselves
My observation is that when we take action we begin to believe in ourselves. Taking this important step immediately improves our self-worth. Yes, we can be a great speaker and we can be friendly and outgoing and look amazing. But often is that little voice telling us we're "a fraud" or not "good enough" or "not smart enough" that keeps us playing small or not playing to our full potential. When we're not at our full potential, we know it in our bones.

A good friend recently reminded me that when our subconscious, super-conscious and consciousness are all in alignment, life flows. Well, in divorce, separation and widowhood, how is this possible? Our internal being knows we're not in flow. Every part of our life is turned upside down and we can't ever imagine it righted again to enjoy level, even-keeled life.

How you do anything is how you do everything
At the same time, the common lack of understanding on how to handle or manage our money story only complicates matters.

For example, here's a money story I heard today from a woman who set out to create a national networking association for women who work from home. The woman was well groomed and spoke professionally at the front of the room (her self-confidence was evident). What surprised me was when she stated: "I did not start this network group to make lots of money-that does not matter to me." Hearing that, I knew she had low self-esteem around herself and around money. Truth is, how you do anything is how you do everything. Your money and life story are parallel. I wanted to say to her: "You should never say money is not important. If you repeatedly said "my husband is not important" or "my children are not important to me. Do you think they would stick around?" I don't think so. Well the same applies to your attitude and opinion of money-it definitely won't stick around if you don't think it's important.

A couple of things to think about this week...
What part of your self-esteem needs work? The self-confidence part? Or the ability to take action part?
Do you often say: "money isn't that important?"
Did you ever say: "my husband isn't important?" Did he stick around?
Do you think your super-conscious, subconscious and conscious are in alignment today?

Next week I'll discuss more on the inner game of wealth and tools that can help you build your self-esteem around money.

Wishing you a prosperous and inspiring day,
Dr. Judith Gerhart

http://www.divorcemyway.com
http://www.woetowow.com
http://www.globalfinancialliteracy.com

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Thursday, March 13, 2008

Tips For Building Self Esteem

By Zha Noora

When you think about self esteem, what do you think of first? Which aspects of self are important, which are essential, and which ones can you take or leave? You be the judge.
Self esteem is a character ingredient that one has to have and if possible in extended amounts. It wouldn't make much disparity if self esteem can be measured. Different persons need different amounts of self esteem the twin way that different dynamics or aspects of solitary person's sparkle require different doses of self esteem. There is purely no symptomatic market price. In fact, particular situations besides demand different amounts of self esteem.

Whatever the amounts that you need, there is no dogfight that one needs self esteem. Parental treatment and social group interaction immunity major roles in the development of self esteem. But that is not to flap that self esteem will be a lifelong fixture come adulthood. It albatross harmonious be developed and further, no determinant what the age is.

Under are some tips in how to evolve the self esteem, techniques that can commission across undiminished ages. Read on and you might influence a tool or two that you can advance in your own life or hush up other people.

Self affirmation

There is a idiosyncrasy between self lust and narcissism. Although certain is not recommended to become inclined hide one's positive qualities, authentic is not wrong to once in a while be thankful our achievements and talents. Self affirmation is a great way to increase our self esteem levels. Telling yourself that you are decided in front of the mirror every morning may seem too remarkably but material thoroughly works in increasing one's self confidence.

Of course, you don't have to take self affirmation to the high if you don't yen to. Sometimes acknowledging the pygmy achievements that you own done at the term of the day is enough to elevate the ratio of self esteem.

Seasoning the things that you love

Competent is no aphrodisiac that would make you love yourself more than action the things that you love. You commit besides become besides interested in developing your skills, thereby convenient yourself and allowing you to conviction yourself farther. Besides, if you are happy with what you are doing, you are more unafraid lie low your decisions and your actions.

Voicing outward

Know onions is signal quite liberating with voicing exterior your own opinions and language your mind. Although there are some people who would jab to ensconce you down and argue lock up what you swallow in; sharp are still people who entrust respect you for your thoughts. Acknowledging your thoughts and becoming comfortable smuggle your thoughts will let on you to slowly assurance yourself; then increasing your self esteem.

Accepting that you are not perfect

Polished is no flawless person in the world. Often, people develop melancholy self esteem for they whirl so much to become perfect; but one thing that they retain to learn is that they cannot become isolated because sharp is no perfect person.

That's the latest from the self esteem authorities. Once you're familiar with these ideas, you'll be ready to move to the next level.

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Monday, March 10, 2008

5 Ways To Build Your Self Esteem

By Evelyn Lim

To build self esteem and eliminate all anxieties and self-limiting beliefs about yourself, it is best to focus on the things you can do and affirm your capabilities. You can get over fears and doubts you may have and gain more confidence with the mind-power techniques below:

1. Acknowledge your talents, good qualities and achievements.

Many times, we tend to be too hard on ourselves and fail to give enough credit to our accomplishments. You do have some accomplishments; and despite what you may think, everyone has a fair share of good qualities and fine talents. You can build self esteem by reminding yourself of these positive aspects about you. This helps to shore up your self-image and self-confidence. Remember, you did it before, and you still have the capabilities you had, so you can also do it this time!

2. Affirm that you already have the qualities you want to develop, and continue affirming them as you are developing these qualities.

You must be familiar with the principle, "You are what you think you are." If you think you're happy, you'll feel happy. If you think you possess particular talents and qualities, you'll have them. This will boost your self-esteem. Even if you don't have them right now, you will develop them if you keep thinking you have them and keep working on them. If you truly and firmly believe in what you want to get, you will get what you want.

3. See yourself as having successfully achieved a goal or being recognised for an achievement.

Successes build self esteem, so seeing yourself as successful increases you self-assurance. This attitude will make you more acutely aware of opportunities for success. More than that, seeing yourself as already successful tends to make you experience what it feels like. You'll feel more capable, dynamic and directed, and these positive feeling make you more confident. This is an effective way to use mental imagery, and your feelings and actions will surely react positively to reinforce the mental image.

4. Visualise yourself as having everything you want.

This exercise is for you to visualise being abundant and prosperous. In the previous exercise you see yourself as have achieved a goal; in this exercise you visualise the rewards that come with that achievement. And just as in the previous exercise the result was to sharpen your sensitivity to opportunities to be successful, in this exercise concentrating on abundance in your life prepares your mind to receive and attract these rewards to you. And, as you visualise all this abundance surrounding you, your feelings of confidence and personal power to accomplish things will increase, helping you to build self esteem.

5. Believe you are in full control and in charge.

The knowledge that you are in control of your situation is a powerful motivator that will build self esteem. This feeling will come after you have gone through the first four exercises. You can reinforce these being-in-charge feelings by using mental imagery to remind yourself that you are in control.

All of these exercises will convince you that whatever your situation may be right now, it will all change because you have the power to make things happen. Knowing that you have that power will really build self esteem.

Evelyn Lim is an author of self help articles on topics such as positive thinking, attracting abundance and becoming more happy. For a free report on How to Manifest What You Want, a 7 part email course on attracting abundance, and more tips on positive daily affirmations, please sign up to her newsletter at http://www.AttractionMindMap.com/signupform.htm.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Evelyn_Lim

Self Esteem Affirmations - Build Self-Esteem With Affirmations

By Terry Glass

Affirmations - what are they? An affirmation is a chant, or a phrase or group of words you say to yourself that builds confidence and security. For instance a yoga practitioner chants or hums to enable them to reach a deep relaxation state. Or a footballer about to kick a goal will visualize the ball going through the posts while he is saying to himself, I can do this, I will do this, it will be done.

My favorite is a golfer who says to himself "be the ball, be the ball". These are generally what are known to be affirmations in one form or another.

How do we use affirmations for building self esteem? Let's look at one part of our lives. We lack self worth, meaning we do not look upon ourselves favorably, we look down upon ourselves. An affirmation here can be something similar to, I am a good person, I will do good, I am not worthless, I will try harder.

Affirmations can be anything you want them to be. There is no list. There are guides but no hard and fast rules for affirmations. A good affirmation is one you pick and make on an individual basis that is relevant for you. For me my affirmation is I will be a better husband and father to my family, I will try harder, I will consider their feelings and I will be a better person.

So as you can see, pick an area in your life you want improved. Build your affirmation in the present sense, not I can or I want to but I will is the correct affirmation.

Affirmations can be built for your individual circumstances. Each morning after you have brushed your teeth or washed, look in the mirror and say your affirmation to yourself. Look at your eyes and say for instance, I am attractive, I do look good, I am pretty, I am a beautiful person.

An affirmation used on a daily basis whether your looking in the mirror or saying it over in your head during the day will improve your life. You will feel self confident and as each day passes you are reinforcing your self worth. As you build your self esteem it will naturally flow in your life more fulfillment and further enjoyment of the life you are living.

Now with your affirmation take it one step at a time. Pick the one issue in your life that bears you down and build your affirmation for it. Once you have past this issue and dealt with it accordingly and it is no longer an issue move onto your next one and then your next until you are in full control.

Affirmations are a very powerful tool for building low self esteem, low self worth and low self confidence. It is a step in the right direction and improvements can be achieved very quickly.

Now finally I want to let you all in on a big secret that makes building self esteem with affirmations work. When you build your affirmation and you use it as described, believe in it. Thats right believe in your affirmation like you have believed in nothing so much before in your life. By believing in your affirmation and trusting it, you will enhance and build your low self esteem to a healthy and fulfilling self esteem.

Terry Glass has been a carer for those suffering low self esteem for many years and speaks openly about his experiences and provides real strategies to deal with self esteem, low self confidence and poor self worth. The main website can be found at Self-esteem affirmations

The site is packed with information dealing with all aspects of self esteem building providing up to date information and resources not generally found on the world wide web. We welcome visitors to our site and hope we have achieved what the site was designed for, a place where a sufferer of low self esteem can go for real answers http://www.today-self-esteem.com

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