How to Build Your Self-Esteem

By Andrea Baljak

Esteem is a simple word. It is worth and value that we apply to people, places, and situations. It is the amount of respect we assess. We have esteem for our world leaders. We have esteem for places like church and synagogue. We have esteem for an exemplary performance whether it is in sports, acting, or simply doing the right thing.

But the most important place we need to apply esteem is within ourselves. We must maintain our self-esteem in order to place value on ourselves as a worthy individual in the world. Self-esteem can affect every single part of our lives. If that esteem is low, our lives will be dull and gray. Elevating esteem for ourselves could very well be the key to happiness in life.

Most people's feelings and thoughts about themselves fluctuate somewhat based on their daily experiences. The grade you get on an exam, how your friends treat you, ups and downs in a romantic relationship-all can have a temporary impact on your well being. Your own self-esteem, however, is something more fundamental than the normal "ups and downs" associated with situational changes.

For people with good basic self-esteem, normal "ups and downs" may lead to temporary fluctuations in how they feel about themselves, but only to a limited extent. In contrast, for people with poor basic self-esteem, these "ups and downs" may make all the difference in the world.

People with poor self-esteem often rely on how they are doing in the present to determine how they feel about themselves. They need positive external experiences to counteract the negative feelings and thoughts that constantly plague them. Even then, the good feeling (from a good grade, etc.) can be temporary.

Healthy self-esteem is based on our ability to assess ourselves accurately (know ourselves) and still be able to accept and to value ourselves unconditionally. This means being able to realistically acknowledge our strengths and limitations (which is part of being human) and at the same time accepting ourselves as worthy and worthwhile without conditions or reservations.

What we want to do is help you raise your self-esteem to levels that will enhance your life and the way you view life. It can make a tremendous difference in your quality of life. Learning techniques to raise self-esteem can be taught and put into practice in just a few days. However, it will take practice to keep your self-worth at the forefront.

We can show you how to improve your self-esteem in just one weekend! Three short days where you will apply what this book will show you and that will stay with you as your life becomes the bright place it should be.

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Help Your Teenager Increase Their Self Esteem

By Scotie Keithlow

Adolescence is probably the most befuddling time that an individual goes through. It is a time when you are no longer a child but have yet to enter complete adulthood. This age of incomplete maturity can be extremely dangerous. There is many a fall in the attempt of the young fledglings to spread their wings and fly. There is a conflict between the child and the emerging individual who has his own opinions and preferences.

Have obtained a considerable understanding of how the adult world functions, there is extreme excitement to experience this new world individually without being guarded by parents. Yearning to enter adulthood, these transforming young tykes do not understand that they have absorbed only a fraction of the mysteries that adult life has in store for them. At a time like this, the teenagers not only go through emotional turmoil and conflicts but also experience physical changes.

All this and much more than what anyone can put on paper is what these teenagers go through between the fragile years of thirteen to eighteen. The most long lasting effect that this phase can leave on the child's psychology is the lowering of self esteem, if not handled judiciously.

Parents need to realize that they have a principal role to play in seeing their young ones through these turbulent times. The process of holding your child's hand through this process starts with taking an active interest in his or her friends, hobbies and interests. Take time out to understand the strengths and weaknesses of your child. This allows you to empathize what your child may be experiencing and will provide an insight into the likely pitfalls that he or she may face while confronting new situations.

Setting a good example is very important. Children and teens learn by example and if you exude self esteem, the youngsters are also likely to have a positive attitude. It is important also to understand that your 'minors' are now becoming 'majors' and need to be given respect. Invite and appreciate their contribution to an adult family discussion and make them a part of the decision making process at home. Discuss the issues which you know may be bothering them but are uncomfortable for them to talk about. Understand that the media focus on perfection may influence your teens and try and show them the practical aspect if life.

Sense the troubles that your child may be having and initiate a discussion around it. If he or she is breaking into an obnoxious inflammation due to acne, take the first step in contacting a dermatologist. In a particularly harassing event for you try and keep your calm and avoid confrontation. Encourage discussions and compromise when you need to.

If you feel that the self esteem of your child is going through more turmoil than you can handle, arrange for self esteem building classes.

The key to seeing your child through this perplexing phase is to encourage open communication and provide voluntary information.

To find more information about teens problems and low self esteem visit http://teen-articles.com

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5 Ways to Stop Second Guessing Yourself

By Steve Errey

I remember breakfast time one morning, some 7 or 8 years ago. I was standing in front of an open cupboard in my kitchen, my eyes flicking between a box of Frosties and a box of Cornflakes, trying to decide which to have for breakfast. I stood there for 5 minutes, until - utterly frustrated - I slammed the cupboard door shut and went without breakfast altogether.

I've learned to make decisions quicker and easier now and it's something that I'll often work with clients to improve. Here are my 5 ways to make confident decisions. Oh, I decided on cranberry granola this morning, by the way.

Test them against your values.Your values are the building blocks, cornerstones and foundations for who you are, and are the things in yourself, others or out there in the world that are most important to you. Know your values and you get the chance to express them, and when you do that all it means is that you're expressing who you really are, way down inside. It feels pretty amazing.

So how do your values fit into decision making? Simple. When you're faced with a tricky decision you can line up your different choices and ask "Which one of these most honours my values?" The decision that's most in line with your values will be the best decision for you (even if it's not the simplest or most practical), because it fits with who you are and what's most important to you. Told you it was simple.

Be like Columbo.When I was growing up I used to love rainy Sunday afternoons watching Columbo, and loved the bit at the end where he'd sidle up to the Bad Guy, say "Just one more thing" and then proceed to blow apart the bad guys alibi. Genius. What Columbo had in spades, other than a penchant for cubans and raincoats, was a great trust in his intuition. In every episode, from the very moment he first meets the bad guy, he knows 'whodunnit' - and more importantly, he trusts it.

What does your intuition tell you is the 'right' decision for you. Forget about all the "What if's" and the details - what does your gut tell you? Learn to listen to your intuition, it knows what it's talking about.

It just doesn't matter.My decision between Frostie's and Cornflakes wasn't a biggie. Whichever I chose, there were never going to be any huge consequences and the ripples from that decision wouldn't have been felt much further than the end of my spoon. The point is, sometimes it just doesn't matter which way you go.

It's not just tiny, silly little breakfast-related decisions either - with bigger decisions it's easy to get wrapped up in second guessing yourself, going round in circles and over-complicating things, when - if you get right down to it - it just doesn't matter.

Going round in circles is only going to make you dizzy, so stop it. Ask yourself this question - if your future happiness wasn't dependent on your decision (and it isn't, by the way), which way would you go?

Have enough information.By all means look at the facts before you make a complex decision. By all means weigh up the pro's and con's so that you can get an understanding of the 'science' behind a decision, but be careful. There's a big difference between knowing enough to make a choice, and knowing everything to make choice.

When you feel that happening, stop yourself, get a change of environment and ask yourself "What do I really need to know to be able to make this decision?"

Doubt vs The Gremlin.Everyone has a part of themselves that doesn't like change, a part that uses every trick in the book to avoid making decisions so that you can stay exactly where you are. I call it the Gremlin, and it's a part of you that would rather avoid making decisions altogether rather than run the risk of making a bad one or screwing up.

This is a world away from having doubts. Doubts are valid concerns about a possible course of action, or reasonable concerns about what might be in store. Your doubts are there to help you prepare for change and prepare for what could happen.

Knowing the difference between your doubts and your Gremlin helps you clarify what's real and what's imagined, what's relevant and what isn't relevant.

I use these myself - different strategies for different decisions at different times - and I always find something that works.

About Steve Errey

Steve Errey is the author of the Truly Confident Living Home Study Course. He's a confidence coach with hundreds of clients under his belt from all around the world, articles in magazines on both sides of the Atlantic and regular expert slots on television and radio. Earlier, he was a Project Manager in e-Business, travelling the world helping organisations deliver on the Internet promise. He has been through redundancy (when the Internet bubble burst), depression and a debt management plan. Steve is also writing his first novel.

Visit his website and blog at http://www.theconfidenceguyonline.com.

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Higher Self Esteem And The Ability To Will!

By Nicholas Fin

What determines your daily results? The ultimate power in being able to exercise your will.

Now, some people will refer to will as 'will power' but the word "power" attached to the end of the word will only confuses us when it comes to really understanding what our will truly is.

Most of us think of power as strength, position of authority or control

The word power added to the end of our own will, speaks in terms of effort or an ability that is used, possessed or has been gained.

But this doesn't help us to understand anything!

We understand that somebody can have the ability to do a cartwheel, or a speaker having the ability to produce sounds, or the human eye possessing the ability to see. But to speak of the ability to will, leaves us completely confused to understand how naturally EFFORTLESS our will really is.

Will: To make a reasoned choice, decision and action

In other words, force and effort is not required when using will. As will is being able to choose, decide and act. We have the will to do so, as we have the freedom of choice. However, this does not mean we can do whatever we want. You cannot make someone do something against their own will

A person 'could' make someone take action by making them feel scared or excited enough. But that someone chooses and acts based on their own decisions.

A person that is scared chooses to succumb to fear by their own decisions. Someone that is excited enough decides to act according to their own reasons.

You cannot make someone do something against their own reasons and decisions, because they reason and decide according to what they choose is best for them.

The notion of somebody making someone do something against their will - is ridiculous. When you tell someone to jump they don't automatically do it every time unless they have a reason or have chosen to do so.

We all possess the ability to will and this must not be mistaken with "will power", which means to apply effort to make a simple decision.It doesn't take any effort to use your will. It's just a case of deciding to move your muscles and directing your focus in the directions you want.

Everybody has will - and for the person that has the typical "will power" label, is just someone that has become used to making decisions, and then acting upon them; as a result, they have unleashed the natural power we all possess within us. The so called 'strongest will powered person in the world' has no power of will over you, as we all have the same ability to choose, decide, think and move alike. THE POINT HERE IS THAT WE ARE ALL USING THE SAME ABILITY!

Will is just a case of: will you? Or wont you?

If you will do something; then you will use your will to take action.

Trying to use power or force against your own ability to decide and act is pointless, because you'll only be resisting against your natural ability of body and mind. When you can't be bothered to do something, you are really implying that you can't be bothered to move your own body. If you end up fighting against yourself to take action, relax and start again - to gain the habit of being able to use your will naturally and effortlessly.

Above all, the choices and decisions you make in the present regarding your unbeneficial thoughts and behaviors that you are aware of, are completely your choice if you continue to persist in them. In other words, if you become aware of your negative thoughts or behaviors and continue to do them, that's your own choice.

Are you going to choose a direction that serves you or not?

If you do not make empowering, beneficial decisions in how you want to live your life; then you have already made a decision haven't you?

You have made the decision to be directed and controlled by your environment instead of creating the future you deserve.

Make decisions that benefit your life's higher self esteem.

Determination is directed focus and action, and action is what impacts your daily life.

Act upon your beneficial feelings and decisions. And use effortless will in life to reach the given end of your desired goals.

In a nutshell

1. Will "power" is described as effort and this is WRONG!

2. To will - is to make choices, decide and act

3. Get used to using your will until it naturally becomes effortless

4. Will you - or wont you?
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Ten Tips To Help Improve Your Self Esteem

By Scotie Keithlow

Improving your self esteem is the best way to improve your life and earn the respect of others. Although this sounds like a tall order, it actually isn't very difficult. Good guidance will enable this to happen. The following are ten tips that can happen when you improve your self esteem.

1. Stick with the positive and shun the negative. Surrounding yourself with positive and supportive people will generate a huge swell of positive feelings in you. This is a good way to increase respect for yourself. In turn, your self esteem will also grow.

2. Have clearly defined goals. Know what it is you want to achieve in life. Set goals for yourself and do what you can to work toward them. Sometimes it's easier to have several smaller goals than one large one. When you accomplish the smaller goals it will help your self esteem to attain the large one later on. It will also make the task of reaching your main goal seem easier.

3. Stay positive. Remind yourself about the good qualities you possess and the accomplishments you made. Remember that you are important to others and have an impact on their lives. Think about how much you mean to others. Don't concentrate on the negative, focus on the positive and never put yourself down.

4. Develop a thick skin. Learn how to take criticism without getting upset or defensive. Doing this will enhance your confidence. This criticism however should be constructive. Don't get hung up by criticism that is cynical or demoralizing. You would be doing yourself a great disservice and causing irreparable damage to your self-esteem.

5. Accept failure. It is inevitable that we will face failure at some time or other. It's important to acknowledge what happened and move on. Focusing on failure too much can be paralyzing. It needs to be an experience we can learn from and move forward.

6. Never compare yourself with others. Like the saying goes, when you compare you despair. It is the easiest way to feel inferior and lose self-esteem. Everyone is different and has different experiences and different strengths. It is better to rate yourself on your achievements. This will give you self-confidence.

7. Never put yourself down. As mentioned before, failures are experiences to learn from and move forward, but give them too much attention and they will eat away your self-confidence, self-respect and self-esteem. Keep positive thoughts in your mind if you want others to treat you with respect. People will respect when you project a positive exterior, even in the most adverse situations. Make it a small goal to filter out all self-criticism.

8. Stand up for yourself. Don't give in to bullies in your place of work or in your personal life. This can only happen if you are assertive. This does not mean aggressive. It means you should exercise restraint and make your point in a dignified manner. If you respect yourself and stand up for yourself, others will learn to respect you as well.

9. Meet new people. If you're self-conscious you may avoid talking to groups of people. If you attend any social or networking events, try to approach groups of people and introduce yourself to them. They'll all be in the same boat with others they may not know. Be a good listener and respond to what they say. It shows interest on your part. Plus, interacting with people will make you feel more relaxed. Eventually you'll be very good at meeting people and making new friends.

10. Take care of your body. Self-esteem is also dependent upon the felling of well-being. Someone who takes care of their body will be a more confident individual than someone who is lazy and poorly groomed. Remember, a healthy body is essential for a healthy mind.

To find more tips about mens issues and improving your self esteem visit http://easy-men.com

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Self Esteem Activity - Building Character with Bedtime Stories

By Jean Tracy

Would you like a fun way to build self esteem, mind power, and character? Inside you'll discover how bedtime stories create mind power, self esteem and character. Why not give this self esteem gift to your child every night?

I remember my mother telling me, "Jeanie, you can do anything you put your mind to." I thrived on her encouragement. You can do the same with your child by using bedtime stories with mind power. Here's an easy self esteem activity you can use tonight:

Preparation for Bedtime Stories ~

Sit by your child's bedside

Create a big black imaginary balloon to represent negative thoughts.

Create a magic imaginary pin to pop the black balloon whenever negative thoughts occur. (Tell your child the pin is for popping negative thoughts during the day too.)

Begin by asking your child, "What mind power story should we create tonight?"

Pretend your child, Chris, says, "Mom, I don't want to go to my cousin's birthday party."

Create that story together and include:

positive images - positive feelings - positive words

Sample Story for Building Self-Esteem with Mind Power and Bedtime Stories ~

Parent: "A child named Chris feels uncomfortable going to a birthday party because..."

Child: "Chris doesn't know the kids. Chris thinks the kids will only play with each other." (Tell Chris to pop that negative thought with his magic pin.)

Parent: (Make a loud "POP!") "Chris used mind power and popped the big black balloon. He's seeing a positive picture now. It is..."

Child: "Chris is smiling at the kids and laughing at their jokes. They like Chris."

Parent: "The kids acted friendly and Chris began to feel..."

Child: "Comfortable."

Parent: "Chris said, "I like this party."

Parent: "Chris uses his Mind Power and says..."

Child: "I am feeling comfortable at my cousin's birthday party."

Parent: "Close your eyes Chris, and tell yourself, "I am feeling comfortable at my cousin's party."

Chris: (With his eyes closed) "I am feeling comfortable at my cousin's birthday party."

Tell Chris to see, sense, and say it in the morning too. Then give Chris a good night kiss. Make your child the star of the same or different stories every night. If you do you'll be helping your child develop a positive character with mind power. And don't forget to tell your child, "You can do anything you put your mind to."

Subscribe to Jean Tracy's Free Parenting Newsletter at http://www.KidsDiscuss.com and receive 80 fun activities to share with your kids.

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Become an expert parent! Choose Jean's Parenting Skills Kit at http://www.kidsdiscuss.com/parent_resource_center.asp?pr_id=kd003 and help your child grow with love and character.

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Questionnaire On Self Esteem - Question 3 Is THE Question Out Of 5 Important Questions

By JY Chia

Here is the questionnaire on self esteem, question three: How Can You Set A Benchmark?

Let me share with you a personal story and you will understand why this is the question that helped build my self esteem which you can use for yourself too. Remember I shared with you in the previous example that I felt that my self esteem was lowered when I was asked to call for food delivery. It is such a simple task, but it was an uphill one for me. Whenever my mum asked me to order food delivery, I would cringe and I will even go to the extent of tipping my younger brother to do it for me.

It could be a mix of low confidence, but one thing for sure, I feel totally lousy that I cannot even do such a simple task that my younger brother can. You can imagine how affected my self esteem was. Disclaimer over here, I did not know this is one strategy that I can use until I was put through it unknowingly.

It was a school vacation, a long one after a major examinations and I went to do part time job with my friends at a market research company. I was totally caught off guard when the supervisor gave me a mini stack of leads where we have to call and seek permission to interview the respondents OVER THE PHONE! You can guess how I felt then. You are right if you are thinking that I chose to quit. That was exactly what I wanted to do.

Guess what happened? I did not quit because I did something and it ws indeed a blessing in disguise. Yes the first few times were horrible, I can hear the tremble in my voice and feel the sweaty palms. It was indeed a blessing in disguise that I unknowingly signed the part time contract that I have to complete the ad hoc project. Yes! It was a trap, but like I say it was a blessing in disguise.

Since then, whenever my mum ask me to order pizza, even though there is this initial apprehension, but I will tell myself that if I can call the stack of leads that will most often reject your request for an interview, what it is to order pizza from mostly nice operators.

That was hurdle one cleared. I am grateful.

Next was the feeling of having a low self esteem when approaching strangers in public. The self encouragement of, "if I can call the stack of leads that will most often reject your request for an interview", did not work for approaching strangers in a face to face context. It is time to get out behind the phone to meet new people.

Perhaps it were the reinforcements made during childhood by loving adults that we should not talk to strangers, but you will agree that you have to interact with strangers somehow as you grow up, be it in school or when are working. I am grateful that the adults were concerned about our safety, just that this doctrine had some side effects for some of us.

That analogy aside, what I did to build my self esteem to approach strangers? I did not have a questionnaire on self esteem to check off what I have to do then. It was another part time stint, this time was with a charitable organization in selling calling cards to raise funds. There were many international delegates present for the conference and I had to approach them to buy the calling card.

Apprehension. Apprehension. Apprehension.

Then I was told by the in charge that the President may be dropping by our booth to render support. We were all anticipating his arrival when he made a U-turn just before our booth to head for the reception, I am not sure if it was planned or it was the time schedule, but I could felt a surge of blood raising to my head and I remembered asking myself, "Why didn't his Excellency even drop by a charity organization's booth?"

What happened subsequently was unlike of me and I have no idea what got into me but I am glad it did, and this was what happened. I went close to the reception area, with a calling card in my pocket, I took out a notepad that I have with me and wrote a simple note. A note to the President!

I wrote something like, "Dear Mr. President, I am JY representing XXX charity organization and we are selling calling cards to raise funds. I sincerely hope that you will get one for yourself. I will be waiting outside the reception area for you. Thank you and I hope to see you soon!"

Alright, reflecting back, I think I was naïve but I am glad that I did what I did. It was not easy getting the note to the President.

1st Rejection: One of the organizing committee member says that this is a formal event and they cannot do this.

2nd Semi-Rejection: I persisted and asked to speak to the in charge of the organizing committee. She says that she is not sure if she is able to help but she can pass the note to the President's personal assistant.

Relieved: I waited awhile before this uniformed tall guard came out and says that he will stop the President for me later on his way out. Just as he turned his back around, he turned back and suggested me to take a photo with the President. Gosh! I did not have a camera with me and he says that he will take care of that. At the point of time, my face was flushed and my pulse were beating at ultra sonic speed because in a moment's time I will be meeting the President and presenting the calling card to him.

Finally: After a few minutes wait, I was greeted by a throng of crowd surrounding the President as he took his leave and I am really grateful that the President's personal assistant paved way for me to present the calling card to the President.

Before anything else, the President asked about my well being and I am truly touched, then I explained to him that I am representing this specific charity in selling calling cards to raise funds, he was sincere to say that he did not have any cash on him, but I was adamant in presenting the card to him. Before he bade farewell, we were greeted by flashes from cameras. And as I was left dazed in excitement on what happened, a photographer pushed to me a name card that read call the National Archives for the photos.

This was it. It was the new benchmark that I have set for myself. It is still working for me now. Whenever I feel that I have some apprehension in approaching somebody. I will say this to myself, "If I can approach the President, who is XXX?"
It works. It can work for you too.

You do not have to necessarily approach the President. The benchmark that you set got to be something that you think you will never have done. Take for example, if you are a student and you feel that you have self esteem issues when relating to teachers, get a chance to speak to the head of department or even the school's Principal. Similarly if you are facing self esteem issues in relating to colleagues, find ways to speak to your supervisor or even the CEO of your company.

The KEY in building up your self esteem is setting a BENCHMARK for yourself.
A benchmark that is high enough for you to say that if you can reach the benchmark, what you are currently facing is just a passing phase that you can handle confidently and you can feel good about yourself doing it.

A quick recap on the questionnaire on self esteem, question number three which is THE QUESTION that you must really comprehend because it is going to catapult your self esteem if you put it into work yourself. Yes! Setting a new benchmark requires your courage and for you to step out of your comfort zone. Take a step at a time and soon you will realize that your comfort circle is expanding and you will feel comfortable and happy again.

Please note that you are allowed to print this article for your own use.

-This article is copyright by JY Chia-

JY Chia Is A Self Proclaimed Self Esteem Coach, From Someone Who Will Bribe Her Brother To Call For Pizza Delivery To Mustering The Courage To Approach The President Of Her Country During A Mega Congress! Visit her blog at http://www.SelfHelpMotivationBlog.com To Get Proven Tips On Improving Low Self Esteem & Get Your Copy Of "5 Questions To Build Your Self Esteem" For FREE TODAY!

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Build Your Self Esteem

By Judith Gerhart

The other morning I attended a women's networking meeting. The group's focus was female entrepreneurship, and the room was filled with an eclectic mix of married, divorced, widowed and single women. Many were trying to start a business while at the same time as trying to pull their lives together. I noticed a lot of talk about self-esteem and confidence. We all took 30 seconds to stand up and sell our ideas and ourselves.

Many of the women talked about their lack self-confidence and how it made them afraid to stand up and speak for the 30 seconds. Yet I marveled at how well all these women did, keeping in mind that for many, it had been a long time since they stood in front of their peers to present themselves as brands, and not just as moms or wives.

It reminded me of how little we support and teach young women about self-esteem, which has two distinct components: The first component is self-confidence. The second part of self-esteem, which I consider more critical, is the ability to take action.

When we take action we begin to believe in ourselves
My observation is that when we take action we begin to believe in ourselves. Taking this important step immediately improves our self-worth. Yes, we can be a great speaker and we can be friendly and outgoing and look amazing. But often is that little voice telling us we're "a fraud" or not "good enough" or "not smart enough" that keeps us playing small or not playing to our full potential. When we're not at our full potential, we know it in our bones.

A good friend recently reminded me that when our subconscious, super-conscious and consciousness are all in alignment, life flows. Well, in divorce, separation and widowhood, how is this possible? Our internal being knows we're not in flow. Every part of our life is turned upside down and we can't ever imagine it righted again to enjoy level, even-keeled life.

How you do anything is how you do everything
At the same time, the common lack of understanding on how to handle or manage our money story only complicates matters.

For example, here's a money story I heard today from a woman who set out to create a national networking association for women who work from home. The woman was well groomed and spoke professionally at the front of the room (her self-confidence was evident). What surprised me was when she stated: "I did not start this network group to make lots of money-that does not matter to me." Hearing that, I knew she had low self-esteem around herself and around money. Truth is, how you do anything is how you do everything. Your money and life story are parallel. I wanted to say to her: "You should never say money is not important. If you repeatedly said "my husband is not important" or "my children are not important to me. Do you think they would stick around?" I don't think so. Well the same applies to your attitude and opinion of money-it definitely won't stick around if you don't think it's important.

A couple of things to think about this week...
What part of your self-esteem needs work? The self-confidence part? Or the ability to take action part?
Do you often say: "money isn't that important?"
Did you ever say: "my husband isn't important?" Did he stick around?
Do you think your super-conscious, subconscious and conscious are in alignment today?

Next week I'll discuss more on the inner game of wealth and tools that can help you build your self-esteem around money.

Wishing you a prosperous and inspiring day,
Dr. Judith Gerhart

http://www.divorcemyway.com
http://www.woetowow.com
http://www.globalfinancialliteracy.com

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Twelve Ways to Improve Your Self-Image and Self-Esteem

By Kathy Atkinson

" Never think that you're not good enough yourself. A man should never think that. People will take you very much at your own reckoning. " Anthony Trollope

How do you picture yourself?

Do you have a positive or negative image of yourself? Many people don't like what they see on the outside, or they don't like themselves on the inside. Some people don't even want to look.

Self-image is how you see yourself, and how you think others see you. You compare yourself to others and make judgments about your physical looks, your intelligence and your personality.

Your self-image plays a HUGE role in how you behave and feel.

How do you feel about yourself?

Self-esteem is how you feel about yourself. Self-esteem is determined by your internal feelings and evaluation of yourself based on your "perceived" self-image. If you are constantly comparing yourself to others and feel like you don't measure up, your self-esteem suffers.

Your self-esteem and self-image are closely interrelated and are established primarily in childhood. The positive and negative feedback you received while growing up, from your parents, teachers and other authority figures, helped create your view of yourself. As you move through life, you have the ability to change any negative self-images you've acquired. Unfortunately, most people never question if the negative beliefs they have picked up are even true.

Is it true that you will never amount to anything? Is it true that you aren't smart enough?
Once you have a negative thought or belief firmly in place, your unconscious mind will repeat it over and over again. It takes about 20 positive statements to counter-act just one negative statement.

What do you say to yourself on a regular basis? Are you proud of who you are and what you have accomplished? Are you ashamed of yourself and disappointed in yourself? Here are some suggestions to improve your self-image and self-esteem.

" A strong, positive self-image is the best possible preparation for success." Joyce Brothers
12 Ways to Improve Your Self Image and Self Esteem

• Make a list of the things you like about yourself.

• Make a list of the things others have acknowledged about you.

• Stop your negative 'self talk'. Replace it with positive, supportive self talk.

• Stop comparing yourself to others. Accept who you are or make changes.

• Spend time with people who value you. Avoid those who insist on pointing out your flaws.

• Make changes in your appearance, clothes, hair or behaviors that will improve your self-image.

• Dress to emphasize what you like about yourself.

• Genuinely accept the compliments you receive about your appearance.

• Start an exercise program - you can change your body.

• Walk as much as you can. Don't always go for the parking spot up front.

• Get out in nature and do some deep breathing and self-appreciation.

• Straighten up, smile and focus straight ahead as you move through your day. You have the ability to look and feel more confident.

" The "self-image" is the key to human personality and human behavior. Change the self-image and you change the personality and the behavior."Maxwell Maltz

Action Challenge

Take some time to really explore how you feel about yourself. Answer these questions mentally, or better yet, on paper.

1. If you are not thrilled with who you are, why aren't you?

2. Are your beliefs valid or did you pick them up from what others told you?

3. How long are you willing to put yourself down based on someone else's opinion?

4. How long are you willing to compare yourself to others who are having a very different experience of life from you?

5. What are you ready to accept about yourself?

6. What are you ready to change about yourself?

7. What would it take for you to truly love yourself?

8. What action steps are you ready to take in order to strengthen your self-image and raise your self-esteem?

" No one can make you feel inferior without your permission." Eleanor Roosevelt

It is up to you to honor and appreciate who you are and what you have to offer the world. Begin today.

Kathy Atkinson is the owner of Creative Life Coaching, a personal growth and self-development company offering products and services to support your quest for happiness and success in your personal and professional life. Since 2000, Kathy has been coaching clients in the US and abroad via the telephone.

Kathy specializes in using EFT, Emotional Freedom Techniques, to help business owners, professionals and individuals release the fears, doubts and limiting beliefs that cost them financially in their careers and emotionally in their relationships. Experience this amazing process for yourself by downloading the free EFT for Anxiety Relief script and audio recording today. Visit http://www.EFT-downloads.com for more information about the Emotional Freedom Techniques.

Kathy's life coaching web site - Eight Keys to Success offers a plan and a process for taking charge of your life. Check out the success keys today at http://www.8keystosuccess.com

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Tips For Building Self Esteem

By Zha Noora

When you think about self esteem, what do you think of first? Which aspects of self are important, which are essential, and which ones can you take or leave? You be the judge.
Self esteem is a character ingredient that one has to have and if possible in extended amounts. It wouldn't make much disparity if self esteem can be measured. Different persons need different amounts of self esteem the twin way that different dynamics or aspects of solitary person's sparkle require different doses of self esteem. There is purely no symptomatic market price. In fact, particular situations besides demand different amounts of self esteem.

Whatever the amounts that you need, there is no dogfight that one needs self esteem. Parental treatment and social group interaction immunity major roles in the development of self esteem. But that is not to flap that self esteem will be a lifelong fixture come adulthood. It albatross harmonious be developed and further, no determinant what the age is.

Under are some tips in how to evolve the self esteem, techniques that can commission across undiminished ages. Read on and you might influence a tool or two that you can advance in your own life or hush up other people.

Self affirmation

There is a idiosyncrasy between self lust and narcissism. Although certain is not recommended to become inclined hide one's positive qualities, authentic is not wrong to once in a while be thankful our achievements and talents. Self affirmation is a great way to increase our self esteem levels. Telling yourself that you are decided in front of the mirror every morning may seem too remarkably but material thoroughly works in increasing one's self confidence.

Of course, you don't have to take self affirmation to the high if you don't yen to. Sometimes acknowledging the pygmy achievements that you own done at the term of the day is enough to elevate the ratio of self esteem.

Seasoning the things that you love

Competent is no aphrodisiac that would make you love yourself more than action the things that you love. You commit besides become besides interested in developing your skills, thereby convenient yourself and allowing you to conviction yourself farther. Besides, if you are happy with what you are doing, you are more unafraid lie low your decisions and your actions.

Voicing outward

Know onions is signal quite liberating with voicing exterior your own opinions and language your mind. Although there are some people who would jab to ensconce you down and argue lock up what you swallow in; sharp are still people who entrust respect you for your thoughts. Acknowledging your thoughts and becoming comfortable smuggle your thoughts will let on you to slowly assurance yourself; then increasing your self esteem.

Accepting that you are not perfect

Polished is no flawless person in the world. Often, people develop melancholy self esteem for they whirl so much to become perfect; but one thing that they retain to learn is that they cannot become isolated because sharp is no perfect person.

That's the latest from the self esteem authorities. Once you're familiar with these ideas, you'll be ready to move to the next level.

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5 Ways To Build Your Self Esteem

By Evelyn Lim

To build self esteem and eliminate all anxieties and self-limiting beliefs about yourself, it is best to focus on the things you can do and affirm your capabilities. You can get over fears and doubts you may have and gain more confidence with the mind-power techniques below:

1. Acknowledge your talents, good qualities and achievements.

Many times, we tend to be too hard on ourselves and fail to give enough credit to our accomplishments. You do have some accomplishments; and despite what you may think, everyone has a fair share of good qualities and fine talents. You can build self esteem by reminding yourself of these positive aspects about you. This helps to shore up your self-image and self-confidence. Remember, you did it before, and you still have the capabilities you had, so you can also do it this time!

2. Affirm that you already have the qualities you want to develop, and continue affirming them as you are developing these qualities.

You must be familiar with the principle, "You are what you think you are." If you think you're happy, you'll feel happy. If you think you possess particular talents and qualities, you'll have them. This will boost your self-esteem. Even if you don't have them right now, you will develop them if you keep thinking you have them and keep working on them. If you truly and firmly believe in what you want to get, you will get what you want.

3. See yourself as having successfully achieved a goal or being recognised for an achievement.

Successes build self esteem, so seeing yourself as successful increases you self-assurance. This attitude will make you more acutely aware of opportunities for success. More than that, seeing yourself as already successful tends to make you experience what it feels like. You'll feel more capable, dynamic and directed, and these positive feeling make you more confident. This is an effective way to use mental imagery, and your feelings and actions will surely react positively to reinforce the mental image.

4. Visualise yourself as having everything you want.

This exercise is for you to visualise being abundant and prosperous. In the previous exercise you see yourself as have achieved a goal; in this exercise you visualise the rewards that come with that achievement. And just as in the previous exercise the result was to sharpen your sensitivity to opportunities to be successful, in this exercise concentrating on abundance in your life prepares your mind to receive and attract these rewards to you. And, as you visualise all this abundance surrounding you, your feelings of confidence and personal power to accomplish things will increase, helping you to build self esteem.

5. Believe you are in full control and in charge.

The knowledge that you are in control of your situation is a powerful motivator that will build self esteem. This feeling will come after you have gone through the first four exercises. You can reinforce these being-in-charge feelings by using mental imagery to remind yourself that you are in control.

All of these exercises will convince you that whatever your situation may be right now, it will all change because you have the power to make things happen. Knowing that you have that power will really build self esteem.

Evelyn Lim is an author of self help articles on topics such as positive thinking, attracting abundance and becoming more happy. For a free report on How to Manifest What You Want, a 7 part email course on attracting abundance, and more tips on positive daily affirmations, please sign up to her newsletter at http://www.AttractionMindMap.com/signupform.htm.

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Self Esteem Affirmations - Build Self-Esteem With Affirmations

By Terry Glass

Affirmations - what are they? An affirmation is a chant, or a phrase or group of words you say to yourself that builds confidence and security. For instance a yoga practitioner chants or hums to enable them to reach a deep relaxation state. Or a footballer about to kick a goal will visualize the ball going through the posts while he is saying to himself, I can do this, I will do this, it will be done.

My favorite is a golfer who says to himself "be the ball, be the ball". These are generally what are known to be affirmations in one form or another.

How do we use affirmations for building self esteem? Let's look at one part of our lives. We lack self worth, meaning we do not look upon ourselves favorably, we look down upon ourselves. An affirmation here can be something similar to, I am a good person, I will do good, I am not worthless, I will try harder.

Affirmations can be anything you want them to be. There is no list. There are guides but no hard and fast rules for affirmations. A good affirmation is one you pick and make on an individual basis that is relevant for you. For me my affirmation is I will be a better husband and father to my family, I will try harder, I will consider their feelings and I will be a better person.

So as you can see, pick an area in your life you want improved. Build your affirmation in the present sense, not I can or I want to but I will is the correct affirmation.

Affirmations can be built for your individual circumstances. Each morning after you have brushed your teeth or washed, look in the mirror and say your affirmation to yourself. Look at your eyes and say for instance, I am attractive, I do look good, I am pretty, I am a beautiful person.

An affirmation used on a daily basis whether your looking in the mirror or saying it over in your head during the day will improve your life. You will feel self confident and as each day passes you are reinforcing your self worth. As you build your self esteem it will naturally flow in your life more fulfillment and further enjoyment of the life you are living.

Now with your affirmation take it one step at a time. Pick the one issue in your life that bears you down and build your affirmation for it. Once you have past this issue and dealt with it accordingly and it is no longer an issue move onto your next one and then your next until you are in full control.

Affirmations are a very powerful tool for building low self esteem, low self worth and low self confidence. It is a step in the right direction and improvements can be achieved very quickly.

Now finally I want to let you all in on a big secret that makes building self esteem with affirmations work. When you build your affirmation and you use it as described, believe in it. Thats right believe in your affirmation like you have believed in nothing so much before in your life. By believing in your affirmation and trusting it, you will enhance and build your low self esteem to a healthy and fulfilling self esteem.

Terry Glass has been a carer for those suffering low self esteem for many years and speaks openly about his experiences and provides real strategies to deal with self esteem, low self confidence and poor self worth. The main website can be found at Self-esteem affirmations

The site is packed with information dealing with all aspects of self esteem building providing up to date information and resources not generally found on the world wide web. We welcome visitors to our site and hope we have achieved what the site was designed for, a place where a sufferer of low self esteem can go for real answers http://www.today-self-esteem.com

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Gain Self-Esteem and Self-Confidence

By Steve Hill

So you are currently struggling with a lack of self-esteem and self-confidence, but what should you do? How do you increase your confidence and self-esteem? If you would like to find the answer to these questions then it may well be worth while to read the article below.

If you do not have confidence in yourself then nobody else will have confidence in you. This is a very famous quote but it can at times be very hard to follow the advice within it.

At the end of the day you can only do your best by giving one hundred percent. If this does not turn out to be good enough then there is nothing more you can do. If for example you are playing a sport and feel that you are not good enough there are a couple of approaches that you can take. Firstly it would be a good idea to work extra hard at training, perhaps attend some specialist coaching and then give it a real go on the day that you play the sport. It is important not to show that you are low in confidence to your opponents, always walk tall and talk a good game however you may be feeling inside. Play the sport as if it does not really matter, this helps you to not freeze or tighten up. Play with freedom and even showboat a little by showing exactly what you can do.

If you have lost confidence at work, perhaps you have made a couple of mistakes lately, then it may be necessary to ask for some additional training. Think about why you have made the errors, are you getting enough sleep each night, do you rush your work etc. It would be worth while to speak to your boss, to explain why you think you have made these mistakes and about how you plan to resolve the issue.

On a social basis people can lose confidence when they start worrying about what their friends and family think of them. Be true to yourself, do the right things in life and you will have nothing to stress about. It does not matter what other people it is what you think that counts.

Steve Hill is a webmaster from Birmingham, he has interests in a number of websites including: stuttering info, gain self-confidence and DVD authoring

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Positive Affirmations For Improving Self Esteem

By Evelyn Lim

Positive affirmations are effective and beneficial tools for improving self esteem because these statements are positive, tangible energies that, by redirecting our thoughts, can alter our emotions. Perhaps, you may not have realised it but the things you tell yourself and the beliefs you have about yourself contribute in a concrete way to your self esteem. If you are feeling inadequate and weak, it is most likely you believe that you are so, and very soon your belief will become fact. In like manner, you can increase your self esteem by actively working on modifications to your self-talk and basic beliefs about yourself.

It is hard to think highly of yourself when you constantly badmouth yourself. Like a bad recording, the inner voice of your ego constantly gives subliminal feedback, and if you program it with negative thoughts, it will keep saying you're never good enough and whittling away your self esteem. But with affirmations, you are able to drown out the negative chatter with positive statements, helping tremendously in improving self esteem.

Using positive affirmations for improving self esteem, especially at times of duress, helps you keep your composure and balance to fend off the noise from the internal negative critic. It is believed that affirmations combine the energies of conscious and subconscious minds to help attain a goal.

Here are some positive affirmation statements that you can use to help you in improving self esteem:

* I am an important and valuable human being, and I deserve to be respected by others.

* I am eager to go through a greater level of self esteem. I am worthy of it and I am prepared for it.

* I am confident about life; I always long for and enjoy new challenges.

* I am a unique person and a creative individual.

* As I build up my self esteem, I feel better about self, my work, my relationships, and every aspect of my life.

* I am actively in control of my life and lead it in productive channels.

* I take time to get to know myself and I treat myself with respect.

* I feel valuable even if I am aware that I have made a mistake.

* I am an action person, and I define my priorities and do things one at a time.

* I take compliments without doubt and give them readily to others.

Improving self esteem is an active and continuing process. Say these positive affirmations on a daily basis and see the difference that they can make to your life.

Evelyn Lim shares inspiring stories, her own journey and useful tips on her blog. She is driven by her desire to help others, after having gone through years of despair, confusion and self confidence issues. Click over here for her self help articles at http://www.AttractionMindMap.com.

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