Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Blaming Others A Sign Of Low Self Esteem

By Carla Valencia

All blame is a waste of time. No matter how much fault you find with another, and regardless of how much you blame him, it will not change you. - Wayne Dyer

Blaming others is a sign of low self-esteem because in doing so we are not taking responsibility. If you do not take responsibility you will always be a victim of your circumstances.

I used to blame everybody and everything in the past until I realized that in doing so my circumstances were not changing and my self esteem did not improved. When I became aware of this behavior I took the decision not to blame anymore.

Whenever I find myself blaming people or circumstances I stop and I say to myself: Is time to take responsibility and I take action. This new behaviour has helped me to build my self esteem because I do not feel the victim anymore.

Here are some tips to stop blaming others and circumstances:


● If you made a mistake, admit it.

● If there is something in your life you are not happy about, do something to change it.

● When you find yourself blaming stop and say to yourself: is time to take responsibility.

● Be open to other's people opinion and if you did something wrong apologize. Remember that you are not always right.
In his book Six Pillars of Self-Esteem, Nathaniel Branden suggest the following:
Self-Responsibility:

● I am responsible for the achievement of my desires

● I am responsible for my choices and actions

● I am responsible for the level of consciousness I bring to my work

● I am responsible for my behavior with other people - coworkers, associates, customers, spouse, children, friends

● I am responsible for how I prioritize my time

● I am responsible for the quality of my communications

● I am responsible for my personal happiness

● I am responsible for accepting or choosing the values by which I live

● I am responsible for raising my self-esteem
If you want to have a healthy self esteem you must practice self-responsibility. This means that you are accountable for your choices and action in your life and especially in relationship with your own self.

Carla's professional background includes 15 years working as a Software Developer and Technical Writer with import-export and manufacture companies. Her passion about self-esteem issues had leaded her to write about her personal experiences.

Since she was very young she spent a lot of time researching and interviewing close friends and family on this subject. She has been examining alternative ways of dealing with life on many different levels.

She studied Metaphysic, Buddhism, and participated in several workshops to work inside herself. She's been using several techniques since the last 10 years like Hoponopono, Emotional Freedom, Rebirthing, Shadow Work and Meditation.

She published her first book when she was 23, "Let's love ourselves as we are".

Her passion: "Give her personal experience to others", her expression: "My life is my teaching".http://www.selfesteemawareness.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Carla_Valencia

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