By K Baker
In our society, it's easy to fall into the thinking that it's just not our fault. From the quality of our finances to our personal relationships to our problems at work - we want to believe that it's not us causes the problem. It's our spouse or children. It's because our parents raised us this way. It's because our ex left us or because our boss is too demanding. It's because our friends just don't understand.
The problem with this line of thinking is that it places you squarely in the role of the victim. If everything is happening to you, that means you don't have control over the situation. It's not your fault - it's everyone else's fault. However, as long as you continue to believe this, you will never live the life you dream of.
The truth is that each of us has control over ourselves. We may not have control over everything that happens to us - and we rarely have control over other people. But we do have control over our thoughts, emotions and actions.
No one forces us to react defensively to our boss. No one forces us to pull away from our spouse or yell at our kids. No one forces us to blow our latest paycheck on a weekend shopping spree or today's object of our desire. We choose to take each of these actions.
When you accept this, your life changes dramatically and you start empowering yourself.
Think of it this way - no one can live your life for you. Sure, some will try. Your parents may have always wanted you to be a doctor or lawyer - so you did. Your spouse may believe that you should do the housekeeping - so you do. Your friends may believe that you should act a certain way - so you do.
But in each of these cases, you're giving in and agreeing to go along with them. Perhaps you do it because you want their approval. Perhaps you do it because you fear doing otherwise. Yet in each case, you make the decision to act in accordance with their beliefs about you.
It doesn't have to be this way. You can step up and make decisions for yourself despite what others want for you. It's your life - start to shape it as you would like for it to be.
So how can you more fully take responsibility for your life? Here are a few ways:
1) Take time for reflection each day. Try meditating or sitting quietly and calming your mind. What is that little voice inside your head saying to you?
2) Eliminate blame. Look for situations where you're likely to complain about your boss, parents, kids, etc. Are you blaming them for preventing you from doing something? If so, how can you rephrase the statement so that you take responsibility?
3) Change your reaction. When you find yourself about to mention how someone else "makes you so mad," ask yourself why you are reacting in that way. You may not be able to control the other person, but you don't have to get so worked up. What is really at the heart of the matter? Do you feel slighted, hurt or rejected? Look at your own emotions and think about the ways you can make yourself feel better.
4) Examine your life. What parts of your life do you wish you could change? Where do you feel powerless or not in control? These are often places where you may not be taking responsibility for your life or accepting the reality of your situation.
5) Take action. What can you do right now to make yourself feel in control of your life? What is it that you want? How can you take a small step right now to move closer towards that goal?
Yes, initially, taking responsibility can be scary, but it's also empowering. Often when we feel fear, it's because we're reaching outside our comfort zone to uncharted territory. And when we do that, we give ourselves the opportunity to grow.
Krista Baker is founder of SecretLoa.com, which discusses the history and philosophy behind The Secret and the Law of Attraction. Receive a free ebook, mp3, and ecourse on creating the life you've always wanted.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=K_Baker
Sunday, July 27, 2008
5 Tips For Taking Complete C
Posted by Davinci at 8:18 PM
Labels: Developing Self Esteem, Responsibility For Your Life
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